Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated April 10, 2013 - 2:35am

@Dino & Strange - I kind of think that is just as bad advice, because by that logic you should rewrite something just because you think people will like it. I mean I know they won't, everyone has critics, but writing with offending people as a goal just seems silly.

And now for my pandering. I've never seen anyone post an outline in the workshop, but I wanted to so I did one. I'm mainly looking for plot holes, but other (relevant) advice would be nice too.

http://litreactor.com/workshop/sub/species-war-outline

Nathan Scalia's picture
Nathan Scalia from Kansas is reading so many things April 10, 2013 - 5:09am

I'll drop mine. I have a feeling the community might appreciate it.

http://litreactor.com/workshop/sub/pawn

Dino Parenti's picture
Dino Parenti from Los Angeles is reading Everything He Gets His Hands On April 10, 2013 - 5:53pm

@Dwayne: I never said to deliberately write something that's offensive--I would agree with you that that would be very bad advice indeed. What I was saying was that if what you normally write is something that a certain percentage of people find offensive, that shoudn't stop you from going ahead and doing it.

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated April 10, 2013 - 6:25pm

@Dino - I believe you regarding your intent, but hope you understand that

Nothing's worth writing if it doesn't offend at least 1/3 of its readers. . .

might not be taken that way.

Strange Photon's picture
Strange Photon from Fort Wayne, IN is reading Laurie Anderson lyrics April 10, 2013 - 7:11pm

See, what I was saying, and I'm sure you knew this but were trying to be pithy or argumentative for argument's sake, was that John should never pull back when he feels what he's writing may make someone uncomfortable or angry or upset. It is one thing to write simply to be a dick, and another to write for the sake of pure truth even in its ugliest form. The ugliest truths are often the deepest truths, and my point - which I know was clear the first time, but since you seemed to want/need me to rephrase it for you - is only that when John carves his way into the marble block of his story and sculpts from it a statue of literary truth, he should not let any sense of guilt or impropriety push him away from the precipice of shaping a real image, scars, warts and all.

Regardless of how that message may be taken, I'm relatively confident that you knew how Dino and I both meant it.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest April 10, 2013 - 8:04pm

@Dino & Strange: sometimes, gentlemen, you have to choose your words wisely and be literal. 

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated April 10, 2013 - 9:05pm

@Strange - Yes, I knew what you meant. We have interacted a fair amount. I directed my post at you because I was interjecting that I thought advice you seemed to have been given was bad, not anything you said being unclear. It seemed slightly dishonest not to put you in it, but it was a boarder line thing at best.

pithy or argumentative for argument's sake

No not really. Why have I read the word pithy more tonight then the last 2 years?

was that John should never pull back when he feels what he's writing may make someone uncomfortable or angry or upset

I'd say 'very seldom' would be better then never, but yeah I'm mostly down.

It is one thing to write simply to be a dick, and another to write for the sake of pure truth even in its ugliest form. The ugliest truths are often the deepest truths, and my point - which I know was clear the first time, but since you seemed to want/need me to rephrase it for you - is only that when John carves his way into the marble block of his story and sculpts from it a statue of literary truth, he should not let any sense of guilt or impropriety push him away from the precipice of shaping a real image, scars, warts and all.

That is actually way better then what you said the first time, even though the first time wasn't really unclear. And I think it would have been fine if you didn't reply, in a feel-free-to-but-realize-I wasn't-trying-to-get-you-to-rephrase-anything-since-what-you-said-did-stand-on-it's-own-fairly-well kind of way.

@Dino - I wasn't sure what you meant.

I really hope this doesn't sound mean, but I didn't really see you much until the last several weeks and I'm not as familiar you as I am some on here. I kind of thought you changed your ID and avatar at the same time; so we had interacted, and I wasn't able to put it together so I didn't say anything because it seemed rude since your profile says you have been a member almost two years. Or maybe I'm just stupid and forgot, but that isn't something I do often. Not just flat out asking may have been a mistake, so sorry. You seem like a cool guy who wouldn't think like that, and I know Moon or Strange wouldn't mean it how it sounded, but I don't feel I'm familiar enough with to make that judgement without asking.

@Moon - The being literal is very under rated. I had to spend 3 hours (IRL) tonight explaining I wasn't using a metaphor or subjective language, but making a literal request.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest April 10, 2013 - 9:15pm

Literally, three hours?

sorry, man. I couldn't contain myself on that one. You have to admit, though, you walked right into that one. 

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated April 10, 2013 - 10:59pm

Yes, if I count being so confused that someone smart enough I'd keep speaking to the would ask something so insane that I'm too flabbergasted to do anything else.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest April 10, 2013 - 11:06pm

I have to admit, I am intrigued. 

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated April 10, 2013 - 11:30pm

Imagine a really bad SNL skit for 3 hours. 

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest April 10, 2013 - 11:36pm

So just about everything after Farley, with a few notable exceptions. Brutal. 

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated April 10, 2013 - 11:45pm

No, I mean way worse then just a normal one from a bad season. I mean like the one you never see even on reruns for the episodes they were first aired in, like Chia Pets that weren't that different from the ones they really made bad, going on for a 180 minutes. Go!

Dino Parenti's picture
Dino Parenti from Los Angeles is reading Everything He Gets His Hands On April 11, 2013 - 10:54am

@Dwayne: Ha, no worries! I MAY have changed my avatar once, but that's it. I just haven't been on as often lately. I get the misunderstanding about my comment; maybe I didn't articulate it as clearly as I could have. Not the first time that's happened.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest April 11, 2013 - 11:29am

@Dwayne: honestly, I think the funniest one I ever saw was a Debbie Downer skit with Lindsey Lohan. They were at a restaurant in Disney World and the only thing that made it funny was Fallon not containing his laughter. I still watch it on occasions when I need a good laugh. The ones with Timberlake are usually pretty funny, too. 

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated April 11, 2013 - 12:34pm

Great guys. We'll put off the knife fight.

Strange Photon's picture
Strange Photon from Fort Wayne, IN is reading Laurie Anderson lyrics April 11, 2013 - 12:39pm

Goddamit, I haven't had a good knife fight since I left Cali!

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated April 11, 2013 - 9:31pm

99 problems, lack of knife fights ain't one.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest April 11, 2013 - 9:43pm

Great. Now, thanks to you guys, I'm gonna need a background check to buy that set of Cutco kitchen knives I've had my eye on. 

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated April 11, 2013 - 9:47pm

If you can't get cutlery I feel bad for you son.

Dino Parenti's picture
Dino Parenti from Los Angeles is reading Everything He Gets His Hands On April 12, 2013 - 10:50am

Mooney's on a do-not-sell-sharp-objects-to list.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest April 12, 2013 - 12:26pm

I am allowed to buy metal coat hangers and a file, though. So I got that going for me. 

Strange Photon's picture
Strange Photon from Fort Wayne, IN is reading Laurie Anderson lyrics April 12, 2013 - 1:07pm

I am on some lists, I am absolutely sure of it. I'm ok with that, though, because I have lists of my own.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest April 12, 2013 - 1:19pm

We're all on a list. A list created by North Korea. 

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated April 12, 2013 - 11:11pm

@Strange - You live in 21st century America. Who here isn't on a list?

Tim Johnson's picture
Tim Johnson from Rockville, MD is reading Notes From a Necrophobe by T.C. Armstrong April 14, 2013 - 12:51pm

I'd appreciate some love in the workshop. I posted a new story titled, "Awakening in a Dead City." It's a bit longer than most submissions (6,000 words), so I figured some whoring here would do me some good.

Synopsis: Two zombie enthusiasts struggle to determine if their city is succumbing to crime and poverty or witnessing the first signs of an impending apocalypse.

I return favors, so don't be shy about letting me know if you have something up that could use some extra eyes.

Nathan Scalia's picture
Nathan Scalia from Kansas is reading so many things April 14, 2013 - 12:56pm

Just submitted my first short story to the workshop. This is the first piece I think I want to try to publish, so I'd appreciate some help. Could be a milestone for me.

Despite Everything

@Tim, I'll probably try to take a look at your story sometime this week. I love zombie stuff.

Tim Johnson's picture
Tim Johnson from Rockville, MD is reading Notes From a Necrophobe by T.C. Armstrong April 14, 2013 - 1:33pm

@Nathan, I'll check yours out, too. It sounds interesting. Thanks, man!

big_old_dave's picture
big_old_dave from Watford, about 20 miles outside London, Uk April 17, 2013 - 12:28pm

I'll have a read tim and nathan, defo. Nay worries

dufrescm's picture
dufrescm from Wisconsin is reading Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep April 17, 2013 - 12:47pm

I'll take a stab at both Nathan & Tim, but I'm a little slow, so don't expect anything before next week :)

Nathan Scalia's picture
Nathan Scalia from Kansas is reading so many things April 17, 2013 - 1:33pm

Definitely looking forward to some feedback.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest April 19, 2013 - 1:39pm

Got a submission calle The Naomi Shots chp.1  It's short, only 1700 words. There's a lot of stories that could use a reviews, too.

Nathan Scalia's picture
Nathan Scalia from Kansas is reading so many things April 21, 2013 - 5:26pm

Thought I'd drop this again, considering how the recent influx of submissions has buried mine a bit. It's about a guy who might be hiring a prostitute of sorts, maybe.

Despite Everything

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest April 21, 2013 - 5:55pm

^ I'm about half way through an LBL for you, Nathan. Ill have a review up later tonight. 

Nathan Scalia's picture
Nathan Scalia from Kansas is reading so many things April 21, 2013 - 5:59pm

Groovy.

(I just used that word again.)

Nathan Scalia's picture
Nathan Scalia from Kansas is reading so many things May 5, 2013 - 7:29pm

I wanted to drop this one (possibly again, I don't remember).

Pawn, the story about a pawn. I think it's something the people of this site in particular might appreciate.

I'm far from an expert in poetry, but I do enjoy stories, so this was what happened when I tried to write poetry about a story idea. Ideally, I would want to turn it into a graphic novel at some point.

I'm not really sure how easy it is to modify poetry based on the suggestions from the workshop, but I'd appreciate it regardless.

Tim Johnson's picture
Tim Johnson from Rockville, MD is reading Notes From a Necrophobe by T.C. Armstrong May 6, 2013 - 7:18am

I'll see what I can do, man. It's been a while since I read or wrote any poetry, but I was into it pretty hardcore before fiction.

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry May 30, 2013 - 12:01pm

Hello there, kind souls.  I'm bringing back this thread, and almost entirely for ulterior motives. 

I just posted my story "The Maiden of Diroc" in the workshop.  It needs love.  Right now it's in rough draft form.  Some of you might remember this story from WAR 1, when it was summarily battered in the semi-finals by a very successful and well-loved story about zombies and sexual subjugation.  And jigsaw puzzles.  Anyway, I intend to polish this story for submission into the world of...submissions...very soon, and I would really appreciate your brutal feedback before I start really tinkering.  It's only 2800 words, so it shouldn't take you all that long.  Give me the opportunity to return a favor (unless you're someone I already owe a favor, in which case you should remind me and also give me the opportunity to return another favore).

And if you don't want to review my story, that's cool.  Please, go into the workshop and review someone else's story.  We're all here to be better writers, so why not go do some reviews so both you and they can make some progress.

XOXOXOXO,

Utah

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters May 30, 2013 - 1:02pm

I reviewed a story, guys!  And it wasn't even that hard. 

voodoo_em's picture
voodoo_em from England is reading All the books by Chelsea Cain! May 31, 2013 - 1:30am

Utah ~ I'm just (almost) in my last week of Lidia's class but I will try and squeeze an LBL for you. If not this week, then next :)

big_old_dave's picture
big_old_dave from Watford, about 20 miles outside London, Uk May 31, 2013 - 1:47am

Utah, 

Nay worries me old son, will be on it like a car bonnet over the weekend.

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry May 31, 2013 - 5:42am

My gosh, look at you beautiful fuckers!  You're beautiful.

 

Did I say you're beautiful?

Looks like neither of you have anything up for review at them moment.  Why don't you post something so I can return the favor?  And then remind me that I owe you a favor (because seriously, I'm awful at remembering shit).

 

 

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry May 31, 2013 - 7:20pm

I want to thank those who have reviewed my story in the workshop.  Please, por favor, everybody with a membership get in there and get some reviewing done.  The workshop needs some love.

big_old_dave's picture
big_old_dave from Watford, about 20 miles outside London, Uk June 1, 2013 - 6:00am

Hi Utah,

Working on two stories at the mo but they are pretty pants at the moment. I'll be posting them after I've done the grammar course I'm starting on here on Thursday. I'll do that and have another rewrite on both and hopefully won't get busted by the grammar feds this time :))

 

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry June 1, 2013 - 6:53am

Excellent!

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry June 1, 2013 - 6:55am

Also, everybody else:

If you have a story up in the workshop that you feel hasn't received enough reviews, post on here and ask people to review it!  It tends to work best if you include a link to your story.

It's easy to forget the workshop is there if you don't keep your stuff in people's faces.  Squeaky wheels, and all that.

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated June 1, 2013 - 10:10am

@Big Old Dave

they are pretty pants

What?

big_old_dave's picture
big_old_dave from Watford, about 20 miles outside London, Uk June 2, 2013 - 5:13am

Yeah ye know...pants...

rubbish, no good, bag of shite, junk, trash...

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated June 2, 2013 - 8:47am

I believe you, but I've never heard that before.

To make sure I'm following; the word 'pants' in this context can is similar to junk and pretty was just a descriptor, so it would be like saying, "It is pretty junky right now?" Because calling someone a 'pretty pants' sounds like a really cool insult, so I'm hoping I'm misunderstanding you.

Nathan Scalia's picture
Nathan Scalia from Kansas is reading so many things June 2, 2013 - 8:49am

I haven't had Internet on my desktop for a while now, though that hopefully will change here in the next few days, and I can start putting myself to work again.

"Meh, no Internet. Guess I'll just start a new Fallout game and not play it any differently than I have the first three times."