avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters March 23, 2012 - 6:04pm

Thank you.  He is very cute.  I don't know exactly how it happened, but he is beautiful. 

jyh's picture
jyh from VA is reading whatever he feels like August 25, 2012 - 8:21pm

Here is me reading a bit of Goethe (I think I pronounce it right in the clip.)

It's kinda thin and shitty-sounding because I used a cheap, old microphone run through an adapter.  Normally I'm not quite so soft-spoken, but the mic's effective range and sensitivity required I speak up-close and gentle.

PandaMask's picture
PandaMask from Los Angeles is reading More Than Human March 23, 2012 - 6:37pm

@Enough

Thank you!

@Avery

I can't repel cuteness of that magnitude!

You have an awesome son! He loves Spider-man and Star Wars. Two of my favorite things. :)

closure's picture
closure from Australia is reading The Ghormenghast Trilogy, by Mervyn Peake March 23, 2012 - 8:58pm

It's morning here, and I am drinking coffee and feeling good, and thinking I might post to this sound bank. Perhaps it would be good to have an Australian accent up here? I won't get an opportunity for another 8 hours or so - I'll think it over and see how I am feeling then, when the coffee has well and truly worn off.

Bekanator's picture
Bekanator from Kamloops, British Columbia is reading Ugly Girls by Lindsay Hunter March 23, 2012 - 9:25pm

@Avery: Thanks for making my uterus tick.  My friend just had a baby recently and every time she brings him over I feel metronome sounds coming from my abdomen.  I like your accent, though.  A lot.  I'm a sucker for a good lady southern accent.  I think they're rad.

I want to do one of these sometime soon, when I'm in the house alone.  I don't have an accent, though.  I don't even say "Eh" at all.

 

Dave's picture
Dave from a city near you is reading constantly March 23, 2012 - 9:30pm

Way cute kid Avery! Star Wars rocks!

Flaminia Ferina's picture
Flaminia Ferina from Umbria is reading stuff March 24, 2012 - 3:45am

@Panda, that's a really nice teaser.

@Avery, you make my heart melt.

@J.Y. That microphone must be a gift from heaven then. Now I'm stalking you on Soundcloud and will loop your soft spoken track to call sweet dreams. Also, I'm listening to one of your music tracks and it's sick!

@Closure and Beka, looking forward for your voices!

Thanks all of you guys. This is awesome fun.

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 24, 2012 - 5:56am

@Panda, good stuff dude

@Same for Nick. 

@JY good stuff as well

@AD I had a feeling you were a low alto

Fylh's picture
Fylh from from from is reading is from is reading is reading is reading reading is reading March 24, 2012 - 6:27am

This is attempt number 1 of 3. Nothing works to get me talking in the REAL WORLD. Even my girlfriend features.

Fylh's picture
Fylh from from from is reading is from is reading is reading is reading reading is reading March 24, 2012 - 6:28am

Maybe this time?

Fylh's picture
Fylh from from from is reading is from is reading is reading is reading reading is reading March 24, 2012 - 6:29am

I give up, just look at the cool synth guitar.

.'s picture
. March 24, 2012 - 7:12am

Phil throws awesome parties like that if you guys didn't know.

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters March 24, 2012 - 7:53am

Thanks everyone.  He's a fun guy to hang out with.  Growing up though.  This morning he wanted to watch Batman instead of Thomas the Train.  And you wouldn't believe how stubborn he can be. 

.'s picture
. March 24, 2012 - 7:58am

Eventually I'll do a sober video. Eventually..

Great vids guys. Very interesting. 

When is Chester going to do one?

And Nikki?

And everyone else?

Bekanator's picture
Bekanator from Kamloops, British Columbia is reading Ugly Girls by Lindsay Hunter March 24, 2012 - 8:00am

Geez, now I miss Shining Time Station.  I guess they just air the Thomas stories as their own thing now?  No more George Carlin as Mr.Conductor?

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 24, 2012 - 8:01am

I am currently watching a barbie fairy princess movie...the care bears is up next.

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters March 24, 2012 - 8:03am

@Bek - yeah, it's just Thomas alone now.  I miss Shining Time Station as well.  George Carlin was better than Ringo as the conductor. 

Flaminia Ferina's picture
Flaminia Ferina from Umbria is reading stuff March 24, 2012 - 8:15am

Cool synth guitar is cool.

closure's picture
closure from Australia is reading The Ghormenghast Trilogy, by Mervyn Peake March 24, 2012 - 8:32am

As promised. I didn't want to put it on youtube, so you will have to make do with this.

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters March 24, 2012 - 8:39am

Closure - very cool!  Thanks for that!  I'll admit to being disappointed about the Fosters. 

Flaminia Ferina's picture
Flaminia Ferina from Umbria is reading stuff March 24, 2012 - 8:42am

Awesome, Closure. Finally an Australian I can understand clearly.

closure's picture
closure from Australia is reading The Ghormenghast Trilogy, by Mervyn Peake March 24, 2012 - 9:01am

@Avery: Yeah I have only seen a real Fosters can a couple of times in my life, and one of them was at the tip. That's what we call a rubbish dump. I guess you call it a garbage dump.

@Flaminia: Glad I could be understood. I'd class my accent as rather mild - the *really* strong Australian accents we call 'broad' and 'ocker'. More like the Crocodile Hunter.

jyh's picture
jyh from VA is reading whatever he feels like March 24, 2012 - 9:18am

@Matt & Flam -- thanks, especially about the music, FK

PandaMask's picture
PandaMask from Los Angeles is reading More Than Human March 24, 2012 - 10:23am

Closure, where's the space car?

closure's picture
closure from Australia is reading The Ghormenghast Trilogy, by Mervyn Peake March 24, 2012 - 10:27am

It's getting fixed. Flux capacitor is broken. Oh sure, Back To The Future makes them look reliable, but those things will go on ya' just like that.

PandaMask's picture
PandaMask from Los Angeles is reading More Than Human March 24, 2012 - 10:28am

Haha, awesome vid though man.

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz March 24, 2012 - 10:50am

These are simply marvelous.

@Cris, great idea. I think I know what people mean by that hint of German (Which obviously is of Dutch influence). Very subtle. I love Umbrian accents. Exudes lubricity.

@ Avery: Cute boy. Makes me want to have another kid. Kinda. But now that my boys are old enough to make their own, I better stick with grandparenthood as my next delvation into human reproduction.

@Rebecca: You know you are going to have to have sex to make that happen. The more the better. I hear certain postions are more amenable than others. And locations. Strange locations have been known to yield better results. They conducted a study of partners who had someone watch while trying to conceive. The conceptions of those studies were just as likely to get into Ivy league schools and become billionnaires as children conceived in the missionary position without an onlooker. What I am getting at is your child might be more successful if you shoot a video for us to watch and post it on here.

 

@Pandrew: Such a well-behaved young gentleman. Have you ever seen Deliverance?

@Fist Kitten: That sailor fucking song is great. I wish it had visuals so we could see your delectable daveries.

@Kitts: You maniac. Dakota, you are one fine piece of work.

@Dave: You are even sexier than I imagined.

@Nick: You tricked me with the opening. Well played.

@JY: Lovely. Reminds me of honey and peanut butter for some reason.

 

@Closure: I think I have the hots for you now. My fuck knuckle does at least. Fosters is horseshit, still like the cans though. I like big cans.

@Phil: As always, you are a cute cuddly genius. I bet I could play that guitar.

PandaMask's picture
PandaMask from Los Angeles is reading More Than Human March 24, 2012 - 11:01am

Chestie!

Haha, no, but it's one of the movies on my list. I'm going to look into it right now. Why do you say?

Profunda Saint-Sylvain's picture
Profunda Saint-... from Calgary, AB is reading Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy Series March 24, 2012 - 12:09pm

@Chester, ahhaha, thanks! I'm fairly certain no video footage exists from that point in my life. Probably for the best. i feel like that could be used against me. 

All of you kids have wonderful voices. Accents are the best. Especially since no one knows they have one. Especially me.

Laramore Black's picture
Laramore Black from Joplin, Missouri is reading Mario Kart 8 March 24, 2012 - 12:19pm

Phil, that blow up doll video is gold.

There's a video of the illusive Phil reading from his novel in the Readings & Interviews Thread.

@Dakota did you just go ahead and use my upload as your sound bank submission? T'fuck?

@Jessica I like your Breakfast at Tiffany's poster!

 

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters March 24, 2012 - 12:22pm

@Laurance - Thanks!  It's actually not a poster, it's wooden.  Do you still call that a poster?  Never mind.

Laramore Black's picture
Laramore Black from Joplin, Missouri is reading Mario Kart 8 March 24, 2012 - 12:33pm

It is posted. Poster plank? Planker?

Profunda Saint-Sylvain's picture
Profunda Saint-... from Calgary, AB is reading Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy Series March 24, 2012 - 1:06pm

Plaque? Not the tooth kind...

Laramore Black's picture
Laramore Black from Joplin, Missouri is reading Mario Kart 8 March 24, 2012 - 1:34pm

Plaques are only for degrees and fancy things.

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters March 24, 2012 - 1:40pm

It's like...pop art.

jyh's picture
jyh from VA is reading whatever he feels like March 24, 2012 - 3:08pm

Thanks, Chester -- I ate so much pb&h growing up.

This is tangentially related -- The Royal Society of Literature in London has a soundcloud account with lectures for download.  Check it out.  There's even one on Saramago (who I haven't read, but I think there was a discussion of one of his books going on.)

wickedvoodoo's picture
wickedvoodoo from Mansfield, England is reading stuff. March 24, 2012 - 4:21pm

Ha. This is a little cringeworthy but to hell with it. Don't laugh.

Kidding. Laugh all you like. Fuckers. Again, ha.

PandaMask's picture
PandaMask from Los Angeles is reading More Than Human March 24, 2012 - 4:31pm

That was an amazing vid. Awesome job man.

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. March 24, 2012 - 4:38pm

@JY--your voice is like melted butter in my pants.

@Phil--thanks for the Shakespeare reading.

@voodoo--Awesome, man. I love Robin Hood.

Laramore Black's picture
Laramore Black from Joplin, Missouri is reading Mario Kart 8 March 24, 2012 - 4:40pm

Clean up 'dem wires!

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters March 24, 2012 - 4:41pm

My God, Martin!  That ponytail is EPIC!  Also, that was lovely.

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. March 24, 2012 - 4:43pm

@closure--love the reading.  Never thought I'd hear Carrie read with an Australian accent.

Bekanator's picture
Bekanator from Kamloops, British Columbia is reading Ugly Girls by Lindsay Hunter March 24, 2012 - 5:37pm

@Chester - I was wondering what the fuck you were getting at, but then I remembered what I wrote to Avery.  I'm not trying for kids yet.  Next year, probably.  My sister's getting married next year and I want to get wasted at the reception.  After that it'll be tantric yoga conception sex at all hours.

jyh's picture
jyh from VA is reading whatever he feels like March 24, 2012 - 5:53pm

@JY--your voice is like melted butter in my pants. 

Is it like butter that's been in your pants for a while?  Or is it like pouring liquified butter into your pants? 

Just want to be clear.

wickedvoodoo's picture
wickedvoodoo from Mansfield, England is reading stuff. March 24, 2012 - 7:30pm

@ Panda - amazing is a strong word, but cheers :-)

@ Danny - Yeah, I like a lot of the folklore around old Hood. The movies and stuff have never once gotten it right though. Not for me, anyway. You want to know my favorite adaptation of the story? It's the animated disney one, with the foxes as Hood and Marian.

@ Laurance. Yeah, my room is a fucking tip. Good news, I have to tidy up this week, the missus is coming to stay.

@ Avery. Yup. It's pretty epic. I know this. Haha. The challenge stands, anybody else out there able to tuck their hair in their belt? You know what, I prefer longer hair on both males and females. Shoulder length is the minimum. Mine has been long enough to put in a ponytail since I was twelve. Have no idea why this is the case. Just is.

@ Phil. The first one of your videos, the blow-up doll one, that was fantastic. You have a face for TV, dude.

Richard's picture
Richard from St. Louis is reading various anthologies March 24, 2012 - 6:43pm

don't have any video, but i do have some podcasts. the most fun is probably the Velvet podcast i did on sex in writing called DON'T PULL MY HEAR UNLESS YOU MEAN IT with Nik Korpon, Pela Via and Nic Young.

http://whatdoesnotkillme.com/2011/07/28/podcasts/

avery, nice videos! i spent a couple years in KY for my MFA (Murray State). if i get back down for an event or a reading you have to come out.

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters March 24, 2012 - 7:05pm

Richard, yeah if you're ever in the area I'll be sure to come out.

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. March 24, 2012 - 8:14pm

@JY--a stick I melted with my body heat.

Laramore Black's picture
Laramore Black from Joplin, Missouri is reading Mario Kart 8 March 24, 2012 - 8:28pm

Danny upload a video.

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters March 24, 2012 - 8:28pm

DANNY!  UPLOAD A VIDEO!