Seb's picture
Seb from Thanet, Kent, UK November 18, 2012 - 1:42pm

Hi all, this is a bit gruesome so feel free to stop reading if you don't like gore or whatever.

I have a scene where my narrator walks into a room containing a dead body, head exploded on the floor, blood and brain, etc. The person was killed about 5-10 minutes before the narrator enters the room. I have the physical description nailed (the internet provides some lovely photos for reference) and I also have the method of the murder, as the killer is still there and they will have a conversation about it (once the narrator stops vomiting). I even have the weapon - a shotgun fired from around five feet away to the back of the head. I found this very useful (and entirely safe for anyone, including those who are squeamish) site written by some guy who trains police and so forth, who dispells myths about gunshots and gives you the facts. For those interested, it's here:

http://stresshooting.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=27&Itemid=85

My question for you all is how would it smell? I'm struggling to find a decent description anywhere. I would guess there would be gunpowder, burnt hair (sweet smelling), burnt flesh (like a recently cooked steak?), but I don't know what brain smells like. If anyone has experienced this first-hand, or has heard someone else describe it, could they let me know what it is like? PM or comment here, either way is fine. I don't need a detailed description, I can write and embellish that myself to make the reader wretch, I just need to know if I'm on the right track with the smell.

I understand that some people may have issue with this, particularly if it brings up bad memories, and I apologise in advance for that as I do not mean to be insensitive. I simply want to be accurate, and have trawled various search terms to find an answer with no luck.

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated November 18, 2012 - 2:10pm

I've done some research on this myself with combat vets who brought up copper and sewage. 

Seb's picture
Seb from Thanet, Kent, UK November 18, 2012 - 2:14pm

Nice one, thanks.

jyh's picture
jyh from VA is reading whatever he feels like November 18, 2012 - 2:19pm

Questions I have: does the blast from a shotgun actually produce enough heat to burn flesh and hair at five feet? Buckshot or slug?

My guess would be that blood and gun-smell would be the primary scents. The head is full of blood. I don't know if brain matter has a smell of its own. My conception is that organs don't smell like much of anything without the fluids: bile, blood, acid, etc. Kidneys don't. Livers do; when cooked they mostly smell like iron.

Know any butchers?

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jyh from VA is reading whatever he feels like November 18, 2012 - 2:20pm

Oh yeah. "Sewage" from the emptying bowels. Does that always happen? I guess it might take a while if the dead guy had recently been to the toilet.

Seb's picture
Seb from Thanet, Kent, UK November 18, 2012 - 2:41pm

The emptying bowels thing is going to happen gradually after about 15-20 minutes of them being in the room, as they are starting to clean up the body. Lovely, I know. From about five feet the blast radius will only be a few inches, I might shorten the distance, the guy is going to say "I was standing right behind him" so it could have been closer. I'm not sure on buckshot or slug yet, still researching this. We don't really do guns over here.

Dino Parenti's picture
Dino Parenti from Los Angeles is reading Everything He Gets His Hands On November 18, 2012 - 2:57pm

I've heard from people, including a couple of cop friends, that bloody crime scenes hold a mineral-ish smell not unlike pennies (like Dwayen above said: copper). Sometimes even bleach (though one cop admitted, since bleach is contained in the industrial-strength cleaners they use to sweep crime-scenes, he feels that he's already anticipating the smell before it gets there). They've told me it's pretty all-emcompassing--they almost taste it in their mouths. Don't know about internal organs, though my assumption is one of natural gas or a rotten-egg smell, especially for pierced digestive organs, e.g. intestines, stomachs, etc. I would also assume a spent-cartirdge stench of burnt gun-powder, especially that soon after discharge. Either way, something tells me these smells would be "warm." Make of that what you will:)

Seb's picture
Seb from Thanet, Kent, UK November 18, 2012 - 3:18pm

Thanks Dino, the metal/mineral smell seems promising.

I'd still like a direct reference to a head shot smell, but thanks so far for all the responses!

Emma C's picture
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Emma C from Los Angeles is reading Black Spire by Delilah Dawson November 18, 2012 - 3:41pm

burnt hair (sweet smelling), burnt flesh (like a recently cooked steak?)

Burning organic matter such as hair and flesh, smells really and truly awful. Burn a bit of your own hair or fingernail clippings: definitely not sweet. Burning flesh smells even more awful and I can't describe— it's like nothing else. Human flesh if "fully cooked" and charred, smells more like roast pig than steak. That kind of heat is not going to happen in 5-10 minutes and definitely not from a shotgun blast. Keep in mind that that amount of  burning would cauterise the flesh, resulting in little to no blood.

My first bit of advice is to not get overly detailed in smells. Yes, you're going to notice the smell, but there's going to be an overwhelming sensory overload at this point, and the individual smells are going to mix together, the less powerful masked by the more powerful. You're also going to bore a reader by throwing too much sensory detail at them, so pick the best and most authentic-feeling descriptions. Smoke and blood are the ones to focus on. For future reference, brain and organs smell bloody (coppery and humid) first and foremost. Rinsed of blood, most (including the brain) don't have much of a smell, to be honest. The best I can describe is if you were to cut the fat from a bit of chicken and rinse it to get the packaged chicken meat smell off: the fat smells like most organs. Just subtly organic and bland. The pancreas smells a bit more pungent and a tad putrid. The guts smell like decay and shit (here's an idea: death looses bowels, so perhaps your narrator smells shit—it's a strong odour). The stomach smells a bit like the more benign flesh, but bitter, also. Eyeballs smell like fish. Liver smells like blood, but far more intense and a bit "smoky". Cancerous flesh tends to have a different smell than normal flesh, and it gets stronger as it grows.*

The longer the scene sits, the worse it will smell as decomposition sets in. A fresh kill like this would not be that odiferous.

The narrator vomits: why? The smell? The sight? I can tell you from experience that once you've vomited that's pretty much all you can smell for a while, so keep that in mind.

 

*I know all this from a combination of years as a veterinary technician doing surgeries, necropsies and performing cautery, and some of my own injuries/surgeries. I am not a homicide detective/soldier/killer/weirdo.

Emma C's picture
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Emma C from Los Angeles is reading Black Spire by Delilah Dawson November 18, 2012 - 3:50pm

I'd still like a direct reference to a head shot smell

Like I said, it would smell like blood and gunpowder. If he walked up and stuck his nose into the hole, yeah, he might get a whiff of brains, but blood is strong enough it will overwhelm everything else.

I'm also a big believer in "method" writing. If you have access to a shotgun or someone with one, shoot it and make notes on the smell. Time it: what is the smell like 5, 10 minutes later? Have someone make a shot, then enter (how does "walking in" on the smell change it from being there when it originates?). Visit a blood bank and very politely tell them you're a writer and are researching the smell of blood: perhaps they can get you a whiff (hey, donate and ask them to pull a little extra for you to check out: Red Cross needs it now). Make notes of what you smell.

Seb's picture
Seb from Thanet, Kent, UK November 18, 2012 - 4:05pm

Thanks Emme, I appreciate your advice. The reason I ask about the smell is that every account of finding/witnessing a shotgun headshot victim mentions the overwhelming smell, but no one describes it. A few reference a sweet smell, they all say it sticks with you and you will never forget it, but no one actually gives any detail. I figured the burning would be similar to recently straightened hair (that sweet, warm smell), and the excess of blood and gore leaking from half a skull would create it's own stench, plus the residue of the shotgun blast.

The smell is going to be decribed first, not particularly at length, just a sentence or two, then two people move out of the way and the body is visible. Vomit. Then there will be a more detailed description as the narrator can't help but look back, and the smell (if it's as potent as everyone says) will seep through the vomit in the nostrils (like bleach does). I'm pretty happy with my style of description and pacing, I just need to know if I'm on the right lines with the smell itself. I want the reader, for a few split seconds, to smell it. To understand it. Then you see the bloody mess, and the nausea takes over.

The bowel-loosening thing is going to happen, already written in as they are trying to clear up the body after about 15-20mins. I don't know any butchers, I could buy some brains from one but I don't have access to a shotgun. UK law is a bit stickly on guns. And even then it would be dead meat, this is live, a person, so I want it to be accurate. The pork thing is great though, thanks.

Emma C's picture
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Emma C from Los Angeles is reading Black Spire by Delilah Dawson November 18, 2012 - 4:29pm

I straighten my hair daily and the smell of that is different from the smell of burned hair.

The "overwhelming" smell would have to be blood. In large quantities it is really and truly sickening, and there is a kind of underlying sweetness beneath the initial coppery scent. I'm not really squeamish about blood but I've been in surgeries with a lot of blood loss that really gave my stomach a turn. I think all animals have a visceral reaction to the scent of blood, be it danger or food. Brain matter really doesn't smell like anything, honest. I once assisted with a cranial procedure and the godawful smell of burnt bone from the saw and the blood were the only things I could smell. The fully exposed brain had no odour.

Again, timing is a big deal. Within 5-10 minutes you're going to have a fresh body that hasn't started to decay. An hour? It'll start to smell, and get exponentially worse. The "overwhelming" smell coming from a body found 1 hour, 2 hours, 2 days after death is going to consist of decay. Watch your timing on the bowels: they're loosed within the first few minutes of death. Moving the body won't cause it to happen, it is caused by brain death. Anything in the large intestine will evacuate; small intestine stuff will stay. 5-10 minutes of shit sitting in a room is going to be a strong smell on its own.

Dino Parenti's picture
Dino Parenti from Los Angeles is reading Everything He Gets His Hands On November 18, 2012 - 4:30pm

Shit, I'm going to Em from now on for all my crime/noir research:)

Seb's picture
Seb from Thanet, Kent, UK November 18, 2012 - 4:35pm

Thanks, that's actually really helpful. I'll change the bowel thing to have already happened, and focus on the blood/shit/gunsmoke smell.

Emma C's picture
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Emma C from Los Angeles is reading Black Spire by Delilah Dawson November 18, 2012 - 4:47pm

Cool, I'm going to start calling myself a "Bodily Function Consultant". Glad to help! I can tell you what an eyeball smells like, but I can't write my own noir, Dino.

During "Scare Us!" I critiqued one piece where a cat was incorrectly euthanised. The guy had just done internet research so I straightened him out, and he was very gracious about my meddling.

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated November 18, 2012 - 4:49pm

I'm not sure you'd have much of a gun smoke smell, even in a enclosed space. 5 minutes later it will have dissipated some (a lot if there is good ventilation), and I think it would be over powered by the blood and sewage smell.

As for the timing yeah, from what I've seen the sewage smell would be quick. Not a expert or such but I've had the bad luck to have seen a few bodies and it was a really fast kind of thing, a seep out later kind of thing.

Emma C's picture
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Emma C from Los Angeles is reading Black Spire by Delilah Dawson November 18, 2012 - 4:53pm

Oh, and find a Medical Examiner to befriend, if you can. I have one who has been incredibly helpful and willing to answer all manner of bizarre questions ("What's the best way to drain the body of blood yet still be genteel?" "What does the body experience during massive blood loss?" "How quickly does an eyeball dry out when pulled from the socket?").

Seb's picture
Seb from Thanet, Kent, UK November 18, 2012 - 4:55pm

Thanks Dwayne, gunsmoke gone. I basically want to describe the smell without stating it, no mention of blood or anything as the narrator can't see it yet, so I'll base it on copper and sewage with a sickly sweet undertone. Much appreciated all!

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated November 18, 2012 - 5:10pm

Doesn't the sweet smell come from decomposition later on?

Seb's picture
Seb from Thanet, Kent, UK November 18, 2012 - 5:24pm

From what's been said here, and other research into the smell of fresh human blood in large quantities, I'm going with the taste of pennies, a heavy smell that is bittersweet initially, sour after the vomiting, and the stench of shit.

Solved, thanks guys.

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ReneeAPickup from Southern California is reading Wanderers by Chuck Wendig November 18, 2012 - 6:39pm

I've actually encountered a dead body from a non-violent death and the smell was very heavy and sweet (in a bad way, if that makes sense). This was only hours after the death.

The only other dead bodies I've dealt with were in the morgue and I will be the first to tell you that you can't get the smell of formaldahyde and death out of your clothes for anything. We kept a "morgue uniform" because it's just impossible.

Wonder Woman's picture
Wonder Woman from RI is reading 20th Century Ghosts November 18, 2012 - 6:49pm

As a birth doula (coach) I've smelled plenty of blood & bodily fluids (though not from dead bodies, thankfully!) I'd say you're on the right track with that metallic, pungent description. 

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ReneeAPickup from Southern California is reading Wanderers by Chuck Wendig November 18, 2012 - 6:50pm

I'm a doula, too!! I'm not practicing currently though.

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Michael J. Riser from CA, TX, Japan, back to CA is reading The Tyrant - Michael Cisco, The Devil Takes You Home - Gabino Iglesias November 18, 2012 - 8:18pm

I'd just like to express my admiration of everything that's happened in this thread. Great read.

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underpurplemoon from PDX November 18, 2012 - 11:09pm

Thank you for the link!