General Discussion : The best pickup lines you will never use because you're too sexy for "talking" and wouldn't it be great if you weren't so you could use them?

Avery, every time you say "vagina cramp" my pants get a little tighter. It's making it very uncomfortable at work.

I guess that would depend on what sort of massaging equipment he keeps in his pants.

GIRL: Why you keep putting your watch up to your ear like that?

GUY: Oh, it's no ordinary watch. It tells me things, not just the time.

GIRL: Okay, so what's it telling you now?

GUY: Says you're not wearing any underwear.

GIRL: Well, now I know you're full of shit, because I am.

GUY (shaking wrist): Ugh. Fucking thing's 15 minutes fast!

In that case, it was a good compliment. 

(although I do find it a little sad that we live in a time where you can't comment about someone's vagina cramps in a complimentary way without your intentions being questioned)"\

 

LOL! Oh Chris, you are a delight. 

I feel we made progress as well. 

Now the important thing is to retain the information we learned.  To forget the past dooms us to repeat our mistakes.  This holds true for events as large as slavery or as small as Avery's cramping vagina.  So to avoid further breakdowns in communication we as a group should vow to never forget the lessons learned from Avery's cramping vagina.  I for one can guarantee that I will be thinking long and hard about the cramping in Avery's vagina for weeks, even years, to come.  I hope the situation with Avery's cramping vagina hasn't left a bad taste in anyone's mouth but I know that I'm a better person for being exposed to it.

I'm going to assume that's a compliment

"Fuck me if I'm wrong, but isn't your name Beyoncé?"

The only line I can ever recall actually using, was something to the effect of, "I just thought I'd come stare at you up close instead of from across the room." With the proper delivery, it's less creepy than it sounds.

@Gordon, no it's not

"And thus was Chrisery born..."

She had me at "cramping vagina"

I'm not sold on the name.

"Cravery!"

I'm all in.

And it has my entire name in it.  Which is what mostly matters.

"Nobody doesn't like Cra-very!"

I'm like Stevie Wonder:  a musical genius (but not dead).

I thought it sounded like some sort of sandwich from KFC.  But now it makes me think of some kind of Sara Lee cheesecake.  Both are positive. 

@Avery, I have never been amalgamated before. Are there rules I need to follow.

So far this seems one sided, what are the perks on this end. Is the insurance good? etc etc etc

There are no perks with her. Only obedience. 

Finally.  Proof of time travel."
 

Or he is a vampire. 

There are no perks with her. Only obedience.

She is pretty dom.  Do you have anything against "spelunking"?

Perks for you?  Um.  I can't say this has ever come up before.  Just the joy of being associated with me is usually enough.

Pass a note to her:

Do you think I'm cute?

Yes = Smile
No = Backflip

Love it!

I think your dad is hot, but you'll do.

That is awesome.

Am I the only one not surprised a pickup line thread turned into a thread about Jessica's va-jay-jay?

I'm a bit uncomfortable for the first time on here, actually. I think we should get back to business! Back to the pickup lines!

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Me: If you were a hot line, I wouldn't mind waiting on the phone.

[The chick was speechless.]

The comfort of your vagina is what's holding this thread together.

^ okay, now it's uncomfortable

I think we should put this to a vote.

Show of hands from everyone who has found comfort in Avery's vagina.

Avery per the rules of our new partnership I will follow your instruction on whether my hand is up or down.