mutterhals's picture
mutterhals from Pittsburgh November 25, 2011 - 3:00pm

How do you handle the above? I always feel like I'm toeing the line between being too sappy and being downright clinical. I love the way Bret Easton Ellis writes sex scenes, but that's not always the best way to go. Is there a particular author who, in your opinion, is able to incorporate both sleazy and affectionate elements in their sex scenes? If so, how, and how would you go about such a thing?

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters November 25, 2011 - 3:10pm

This is somewhat hard to answer.  I put sex scenes inmy work only if I feel they are nessesary to the plot.   I don't personally want to write it just for kicks if there is no reason for it.

That said, my latest WIP novel has a few sex scenes.  One is vaguely implied, and if you don't get it, it doesn't matter and if you do, you get a little grin.  Another is more obvious, but the reader doesn't get to "watch".  The third, is an angry hate sex sort of thing.  So the reader has to watch it play out. 

I think the important thing is to get to your own emotions (or really the emotions of your character) if you are writing it all out.  Write the emotion, through the action.  Does that make any sense? 

mutterhals's picture
mutterhals from Pittsburgh November 25, 2011 - 3:25pm

Totally, I just have a hard time doing that. As far as the action, I mean. Like I said, I don't want to get too clinical, but I also don't want to stray into the 'he inserted his thoughtful penis into her loving vagina' territory. Also, I have something against the words humping, bucking, moist, insertion, erection, throbbing, etc., I feel like those are all very cliched. And what do you call the parts? Do you go lowbrow and use slang, or do you refer to their given names, or what? I'm just trying to get a sense as to how other writers deal with this.

Typewriter Demigod's picture
Typewriter Demigod from London is reading "White Noise" by DeLilo, "Moby-Dick" by Hermann Mellivile and "Uylsses" by Joyce November 25, 2011 - 5:04pm

take a look at the scenes in "Dermaphoria" by Clevenger and "Fucking Daphne". Both of those illustrate sex with intelligence and sparkle. Alternatively, if it makes it easier being told what not to do, look at the bad sex awards.

jl85's picture
jl85 from originally East Tennessee now Southern California is reading everything I can November 25, 2011 - 6:04pm

It's been a few years since I read it but The Game by Neil Straus dealt with sex in general a lot. But as far as writing sex I just try to stick with my characters dialogue.. which I think for most guys it comes down to sounding slang-y for the most part. It's been said many times before, don't censor your characters. If your protagonist is male and he's a "guy's guy" he's probably going to use words like cock and erection. If your characters an M.D. then he might say penis and vagina. Just keep your narrator true to his/her personality.

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters November 25, 2011 - 6:12pm

"'he inserted his thoughtful penis into her loving vagina' "

Don't say that!  Hahahaha!  Never ever say that! 

You don't nessesarily have to use the words at all if you can't find one that suits you.  You can say something like, he sank into her.  And everyone gets the idea.  Although, don't say that exaclty, because that sounds a little gross.  Like she might be a muddy spot he got caught up in.  hm. 

 

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz November 25, 2011 - 6:17pm

I've gotten caught in a few muddy spots.

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters November 25, 2011 - 6:19pm

Well then, perhaps it's perfect after all!

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. November 25, 2011 - 6:31pm

One of my creative writing teachers used to refer to a woman's vagina as a "dark triangle" in all his writings.  My female friend always said, "Hasn't he ever seen a shaved one?"

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters November 25, 2011 - 6:43pm

I hate it when people try to get too fancy with it.  Dark triangle?  Sheesh.  Something about that sounds very misogynistic.  Or possibly Wiccan. 

 

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz November 25, 2011 - 6:55pm

Besides, it's the what the triangle is pointing to where all the fun's to be had.

Bekanator's picture
Bekanator from Kamloops, British Columbia is reading Ugly Girls by Lindsay Hunter November 25, 2011 - 9:19pm

I don't even really describe the sex.  Just, "We fucked in his car."  The real sexy part is the tension between the characters and how it affects them.  For instance, in a scene about knife play, I wouldn't even really mention anything about throbbing members; the knife is kind of the high point in the scene.  Make the knife sexy. 

Instag8r's picture
Instag8r from Residing in Parker, CO but originally from WV is reading Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy November 25, 2011 - 11:10pm

Photographing nude models on a regular basis I hear all kinds of names for vaginas. Cooter, Va jay jay, Hoo Hoo, Monkey, Peach, Punany and on and on. I even had one model refer to it as her Dick Eater.

Bruno Hat's picture
Bruno Hat from Glasgow, Scotland is reading writing and arithmetic November 26, 2011 - 9:50am

"I even had one model refer to it as her Dick Eater."
Ha, that's brilliant. Although maybe I should be offended (what's the female equivalent of misogyny?).

 

Instag8r's picture
Instag8r from Residing in Parker, CO but originally from WV is reading Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy November 26, 2011 - 10:28am

@ Bruno Hat - That would be misandry.

Bruno Hat's picture
Bruno Hat from Glasgow, Scotland is reading writing and arithmetic November 26, 2011 - 10:37am

That's great. My name's Andy so the next girlfriend I get I'll call her missandy.

Instag8r's picture
Instag8r from Residing in Parker, CO but originally from WV is reading Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy November 26, 2011 - 10:52am

You dropped the "r"

Misandry - the hatred of men

Misandrist - a female who hates men

Bruno Hat's picture
Bruno Hat from Glasgow, Scotland is reading writing and arithmetic November 26, 2011 - 11:02am

It was intentional Instag8...oops, there I go again.

ReneeAPickup's picture
Class Facilitator
ReneeAPickup from Southern California is reading A truckload of books November 27, 2011 - 12:39pm

I try to avoid naming parts. It gets too cheesy and feels like a novel for over forty lonely housewives. I go for more subtle descriptors, like "She pulled him into her". If you've got a little  imagination, it's pretty graphic, if you'e a little more delicate it is quite soft and romantic. I like stuff like that when it comes to writing sex.

I tend to focus more on the emotions the sex brings up, and only talk about the act itself when I need to, to keep things moving.

mutterhals's picture
mutterhals from Pittsburgh November 27, 2011 - 2:43pm

That was all very insightfull, thanks to everyone who commented.

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. November 28, 2011 - 3:39am

He felt her smooth hands caress his body and take off his shirt, button by button.  Her husband began to undo his pants and kiss him on the lips.  He felt the rough texture of the man’s stubble rub against his face as his wife pinched his nipples.  Joel stroked his cock and furiously cupped his balls while using one finger to rub his taint.  Constance started sucking on his neck then he turned to face her and she grabbed his cock to put it inside of her.  As they neared the bed, she lay down with her legs spread and he slid himself inside of her while Joel ate his ass out.  Then Joel fingered him as he fucked his wife.  Constance moaned wildly and clawed at Adam’s back.  Joel lubed up and slid inside Adam then as Adam fucked his wife and the three of them collapse in a sticky pile of flesh.  That was when he felt the piano wire around his neck and Joel began to choke him.