Writing : POLL: Beyond Thunderdome Averydoll vs Sean of the Dead

I don't see new drafts. I assume you  decided on just the one. I still hope to read future drafts, even if you two decide to just save points and edit the versions you have already posted. (Let me know if you do that, because I would love to see how your stories evolve.) 

I don't know if anyone voted yet and I do not want to be first. Especially if you guys really are about to pop up second drafts. Let me know. Great job, both of you.

I don't know what the talk is of different drafts, as I am not renewing my workshop sub until War starts. I read and voted on the versions attached here.

Lots of blood and gore in this duel. What was the prompt, compete to make the biggest mess?

Both stories are very intense, and there isn't a lot in it. In the end Jess wins, but only because her story hints at a bigger picture behind the scenes than what Sean's does.

You clever gal/lady/woman/female (whichever you find least offensive.) You set it up so you could save points and nonworkshop members could vote. Job well done. I'll read them today and vote when I'm done.

vote closes Friday, you still have time

Vignettes.

Tell me a story! Let me see you write, not describe!

oooh, this one is tight.

I thought Closet was powerful in its depiction of a murderous sexual hatred.  The vast majority of serial killer scenes, unless I miss my guess, are dominated by male haters, so, it was a nice change of perspective. And the story worked well for me from a reactive visceral standpoint.  I agree that although Closet remained rather horrifyingly present throughout, a lot was suggested, and reader's could feel the nature of her psychosis in that kind of completely irrational jealousy that if newspapers are any indication attaches all over the damned world to sexuality. 

So, yeah, I thought the sense of suffocation in both the kick to the stomach and then amplified a bit down the road by the choking that opens his mouth, and then that Polaroid of Mark cooking dinner for his girlfriend shoved down his throat.  I liked when their eyes are inches apart and she sees, "the arrogance of his gaze begin to flicker," and also the "hot wet pennies that wash over her tongue during his animal yowl."  It might have made me catch a coppery chill, because I recently read a murder scene that included the idea of how recently spilt blood smells of copper.  So the hot, wet pennies brought that idea to life, and I thought it was a good ending, to suggest the next eligible bachelor and his closet being prepared. 

       So, thanks for the read Averydoll.  I'll cast my vote and write some things I thought about A Dream Deferred tommorow because I'm too tired now.   

I liked both, but I chose one because it had more sexual content.

Close race. Good luck guys!

bumping to keep this relevant while the WAR talk rages on

Jess, I agree that they both sorta think alike, almost. I don't know why, but I liked them both and feel like this is the best match-up ever. I think I chose the other story because of the ending. Lol. I'm such a horndog.

I do find myself wondering if they brainstormed these stories together.  Or role-played them.

So, I gotta stop going on and on like tedium itself, where it doesn't belong.  I thought A Dream Deferred was interesting.  The mirror image to its opponent Averydoll's Closet aspect (but with a much more succsessful if she can be called that, victim of abuse) was really cool, and so was your ambition in taking on the female point of view from murder through masturtbation so directly.  Oh, and that flapping wallpaper image was a nice shiver.  So, thanks for the work Sean. 

safe word bump

I like your business acumen Jessica! 

Is that a picture of Sean?

Geez, he's old.

Hey Zombieman, I'm six months further from an old-age death than you!  Do you have any bad habits that could feasibly stretch your lead? 

Aside from letting Jessica duct tape you and stab you in a closet.

It's a project I'm doing as research for a story I'm writing.

This is for art.

I do know how long that takes.

Why you copying my hair, Sean?  That's very two thousand and late.