...lived a turtle named Paul.
He wasn't too large, too wide, or too small.
But today was exciting, and Paul could not wait
To finally go out there and find his first mate!
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His shell was wrapped with tinfoil and tinsel
And his late human owner had marked him with stencil:
"Paul the Snap-daddy" in fat yellow letters
Announced to lame turtles that Paul was their better.