R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 1, 2012 - 5:08am

So, I'm back. Caught charges and was sentenced to 30 days in the county jail. Or, 30 days of inpatient rehab. I chose rehab, of course. I'm way too small and cute (haha) for jail. But, they let me out after only 21 days. Insurance and all that... My question is: given the choice, what would you choose? Rehab or jail? I think the answer is obvious.

Bekanator's picture
Bekanator from Kamloops, British Columbia is reading Ugly Girls by Lindsay Hunter May 1, 2012 - 5:12am

I've heard smaller jails are like adult daycare.  Nevertheless, I wouldn't want to chance that.  I'd go with rehab.

Geez, dude.  I'm glad you're out.  We were worried about you.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 1, 2012 - 5:14am

Thanks Bek! Our county here is rough. I spent a night in processing. I'll never go back there.

Bekanator's picture
Bekanator from Kamloops, British Columbia is reading Ugly Girls by Lindsay Hunter May 1, 2012 - 5:18am

Next time you can come up here.  All the hobos like committing small crimes so they can get into prison during the winter.  It's better than freezing outside.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 1, 2012 - 5:22am

Haha! BC may get me into trouble! Isn't pot legal there? Of course. Nelly furtado is from up that way. I love nelly!

Bekanator's picture
Bekanator from Kamloops, British Columbia is reading Ugly Girls by Lindsay Hunter May 1, 2012 - 5:25am

It's iffy.  But everybody smokes pot in BC.  If you've got a small amount you won't get intro trouble.  This guy in my city had a pot store.  He only sold to medicinal users but he didn't really have a permit or whatever it is you need to do that.  He got arrested but everybody wrote letters to the paper about how bullshit it was that the cops were wasting their time on him when there are clearly bigger issues going on on the same damn street.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 1, 2012 - 5:27am

Yea. It's the same here. Well, not medicinal in Pennsylvania, but they do waste a lot of time and tax payers money on low level dealers. They crack down here.

wickedvoodoo's picture
wickedvoodoo from Mansfield, England is reading stuff. May 1, 2012 - 5:57am

If it was just for pot then that is fooking ridiculous. You have my utter sympathies dude.

Glad you're back!

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 1, 2012 - 6:01am

Thanks wicked! Good to be back.

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry May 1, 2012 - 6:01am

Ryan, glad you're back!

Rehab every time for me, man.  If I ever go up for embezzlement or extortion or something like that, I hope they offer me rehab as an option.

 

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 1, 2012 - 6:03am

Thanks man! Haha! I don't think they have an extortion rehab. All they would say is: quit breaking the fucking law! Then give you a bologna sandwich.

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry May 1, 2012 - 6:33am

I do not care for bologna.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 1, 2012 - 6:39am

Haha! Me either, but CO's at jail don't give a shit.

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry May 1, 2012 - 6:40am

Well, I'm sure it's organic bologna.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 1, 2012 - 6:44am

If you mean taken from the organs of those who were killed or committed suicide, then yes, it's organic.

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry May 1, 2012 - 7:17am

That's what I meant.  My nutritionist (me) would approve of the bologna selection, in that case.

voodoo_em's picture
voodoo_em from England is reading All the books by Ira Levin May 1, 2012 - 9:02am

Welcome back Mr Moon.

Our jails are different to yours, but I'd still choose rehab 100 times over jail.

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner May 1, 2012 - 9:06am

Welcome back man. I spent a weekend in an INS border prison once. I was the only guy who spoke English. (long story) good food. Then a night in the drunk tank in college. 

I would have gone with rehab. I wouldn't have picked it because it's easy, but to actually committ to it, IF you had an actual problem. No smokes though? Ugh. 

Nick Wilczynski's picture
Nick Wilczynski from Greensboro, NC is reading A Dance with Dragons by George R.R. Martin May 1, 2012 - 10:13am

Moon, I sympathize. My case isn't going to trial for a couple of months, but I am in a very similar position right now.

Yes, I'm going with the "not prison" option.

Profunda Saint-Sylvain's picture
Profunda Saint-... from Calgary, AB is reading Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy Series May 1, 2012 - 10:35am

That sucks, Ryan! Glad you're free again. I've got a friend doing a year long stint in rehab for a pretty serious charge, I think she only ended up in the remand centre for about a week all in all, but she's allowed to work again, finally. Doing much better at least. Glad she was able to stay outta real jail, at least. Definitely the better option. Unless like Bek said, you're homeless. In that case jail here equals a roof over your head, three meals a day, basic cable and a book cart. Doesn't sound so terrible, but I'd take rehab any day.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 1, 2012 - 10:57am

Thanks all!
@Matt: man, only guy in prison who speaks English? Shit!
@Nick: I hope all goes well for you. Good luck, bro.
@Prof: not homeless, thank God. Gotta go to some AA meetings and get a slip signed. Not too bad.
Thanks again for the warm welcome back! Appreciate it!

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry May 1, 2012 - 11:33am

Alien hasn't shown up yet to give you your real welcome.

Clutch's picture
Clutch from Detroit Metro Area now living in Charlotte, NC is reading "The Spooky Art" by Norman Mailer May 1, 2012 - 11:37am

I'd choose rehab for sure.

Been in jail; only for a day and a half due to a drinking while driving drunk as a skunk charge (.327 BAC drunk) and it sucked solid. The lights were on 24 hours. There were no clocks. I could not tell if it was night or day. And they turned the air conditioning down to 45 degrees in the dead of winter as freeze torture. They took my clothes (I was in a t-shirt and jeans and socks). No blankets. It was cold as hell. I couldn't take another day in there.

Had to go to court ordered outpatient rehab after that. That was a blast.

Today, I'm sober, five years now.

.'s picture
. May 1, 2012 - 12:07pm

Rehab. 

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. May 1, 2012 - 3:00pm

I would choose jail for the hot sex. I have a prison fantasy. It involves a fiveway gangbang and a nightstick.

Welcome back!

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 1, 2012 - 3:23pm

Dude... I've missed you! Alien, you fucking rule man! Thank you for the welcome back!

PandaMask's picture
PandaMask from Los Angeles is reading More Than Human May 1, 2012 - 3:28pm

Welcome back man. I actually asked about you to Alien and your whereabouts.

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz May 1, 2012 - 3:30pm

Glad to hear you're okay. Welcome back, we missed you.

I think I might need to go to prison or rehab.

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. May 1, 2012 - 3:45pm

Prison has the best drugs, but rehab does have emotionally vulnerable girls.  Shit... Tough choice.  Good sex either way!  

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 1, 2012 - 3:49pm

Thanks guys...
@Howie: good point, but the place I was at, we weren't allowed to talk to the women. Boo!

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. May 1, 2012 - 3:52pm

You didn't dress in drag and pretend to be a woman to get into the woman's section?  80's situational comedies have failed you. 

Welcome back.  Did you get raped?

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 1, 2012 - 5:17pm

Damn Howie... Should've thought of Bosom Buddies!

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. May 1, 2012 - 6:10pm

I have a rehab fantasy too of falling in love with a methhead and we pull out each other's teeth and make necklaces.

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz May 1, 2012 - 6:12pm

What, Tom Hanks picking up a bar of soap while doing his Forrest Gump "Life is like a bowel of choc-o-lates."

ReneeAPickup's picture
Class Facilitator
ReneeAPickup from Southern California is reading Wanderers by Chuck Wendig May 1, 2012 - 7:04pm

Welcome back, and I'd choose rehab.

Did I read that right, though? This was over pot? Christ almighty.

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. May 1, 2012 - 7:37pm

Pot is just our code word for jail bait.  The 'rehab' was really chemical neutering. 

 

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz May 1, 2012 - 7:46pm

 

Coming soon to everywhere near you.

Grigori Black's picture
Grigori Black from US is reading Radium Girls by Amanda Gowin May 1, 2012 - 8:12pm

@R.Moon

good point, but the place I was at, we weren't allowed to talk to the women. Boo!

 

Shit, if you were worried about what you were allowed to do, you wouldn't be faced with the rehab/jail choice.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 2, 2012 - 6:19am

Thanks guys! No, this wasn't over pot.

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry May 2, 2012 - 6:35am

Come on, guys, get with the scenario.  Ryan is Irish.  You really think this was over weed?

Jose F. Diaz's picture
Jose F. Diaz from Boston is reading Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantel May 2, 2012 - 9:43am

Whatever it was for I would take Rehab than have the chance of being shanked. But i'm pretty sure whatever it was for he deserved the death penalty and they let him go with this.

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. May 2, 2012 - 9:47am

My theory is that it had a little to do with drugs, a lot to do with an underage prostitute, and even more to do with Crosby coming back to the Penguins for the hockey play-offs.  There might have been a little extortion, mayhaps some cat-knapping (which is stealing a cat, not sleeping for short periods of time), and a bit of light treason.  

The 'irish' thing only had a hand in getting the Irish mob to face off against the Italians, but really it was a gambit to distract them from his real goal...

What was the real goal, Moon?  That's what I can't figure out.  What was the end game?

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 2, 2012 - 11:41am

I shot a man in Reno... Funny thing is, I've never been to Reno.

Chris Davis's picture
Chris Davis from Indiana is reading A Feast of Snakes by Harry Crews May 2, 2012 - 11:49am

I've done a few days in each but not enough to form a real opinion. The food was better in rehab, the conversation was better in jail. It's a coin toss, you can't go wrong.

Mike Mckay's picture
Mike Mckay is reading God's Ashtray May 2, 2012 - 12:09pm

Haven't been to neither though I hear jail is fun (with friends) and rehab is also fun (when breaking out)

Am I missing out on anything?

Chris Davis's picture
Chris Davis from Indiana is reading A Feast of Snakes by Harry Crews May 2, 2012 - 3:06pm

No your not missing out. My time in jail was minimum after that I was locked in my house for six months. No one would recommend it who has been there, but while I was stuck I made the best of it and learned my shit. I didn't come out of it bitter, it was good for stopping my life from the direction it was going.

As for rehab/institutionalization, same thing. I spend my time in there after my mother took on the bulk of my detox, so it wasn't as intense as it could have been. Not fun but if you do ever end up there take out of it what is intended. One thing I did learn, all those things you read about in Irvine Welsh novels that you think he is exaggerating about, he is dead on. From what I saw and how my mom described to me how I was acting he might just write the most accurate portrayals of rock bottom human behavior you can find. 

Moon, I'm glad you're out. If you did need it I hope you took something from it.  It saved my ass and I know some others that it did wonders for.  As shitty as the situation was the only thing that will make it worse is if you took nothing from it, whether that be a story idea or a life lesson.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 2, 2012 - 3:09pm

Moon, I'm glad you're out. If you did need it I hope you took something from it.  It saved my ass and I know some others that it did wonders for.  As shitty as the situation was the only thing that will make it worse is if you took nothing from it, whether that be a story idea or a life lesson.

- Truth is, it wasn't my first 'rodeo'. 

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz May 2, 2012 - 3:28pm

All this chatter just makes me want a Maker's neat and a big fat rail.

Chris Davis's picture
Chris Davis from Indiana is reading A Feast of Snakes by Harry Crews May 3, 2012 - 3:21am

"- Truth is, it wasn't my first 'rodeo'. "

You went to jail for bull riding?

 

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest May 3, 2012 - 4:49am

Rodeo is rehab lingo for... Rehab.

ReneeAPickup's picture
Class Facilitator
ReneeAPickup from Southern California is reading Wanderers by Chuck Wendig May 3, 2012 - 10:13am

Well, I hope you got something out of the experience, and that whatever you got out of it is what you needed. That means a lot of different things to a lot of different people and I'm not here to assume I know what that might be for you. 

Welcome back, though.