doctorrude's picture
doctorrude from Hampshire, England. is reading The Castle-Kafka July 1, 2012 - 1:18pm

Hello, nice to meet you all. My name is Nick and I'm a young writer from over the pond in grand old England.

I've been writing most of my life and started to get a bit serious about it lately. I finished writing my first "proper" novel last Christmas which has gotten some good feedback and I'm cracking on with my next.

I thought I'd join this community because you all sound like a friendly and articulate bunch. Glad to be here.

Kirk's picture
Admin
Kirk from Pingree Grove, IL is reading The Book Of The New Sun July 1, 2012 - 4:12pm

Hi Nick, good to hear from you. It's Sunday so we tend to be a little quiet. You joined at a very cool time, make sure you check out our first ever writing challenge, Scare Us. If you don't care to write, feel free to read stories as people submit them.

Now, on with the "getting to know you" part

  1. What sort of crisps (look at how clever I am!) go best with your favorite book? What is the book?
  2. Who is your favorite author with 3 vowels in their first name?
  3. If you could personally write a sequel to any book, which would it be?
Michael J. Riser's picture
Michael J. Riser from El Cerrito, CA (originally), now Fort Worth, TX is reading The San Veneficio Canon - Michael Cisco, The Croning - Laird Barron, By the Time We Leave Here, We'll Be Friends - J. David Osborne July 1, 2012 - 4:23pm

Welcome! I'd offer you a beer, but... Internet and all. Enjoy your stay!

ReneeAPickup's picture
Class Facilitator
ReneeAPickup from Southern California is reading Wanderers by Chuck Wendig July 1, 2012 - 4:33pm

Welcome!

Chris Davis's picture
Chris Davis from Indiana is reading A Feast of Snakes by Harry Crews July 1, 2012 - 4:38pm

Hello Nick,

I am here to pre-welcome you. The official welcome will come in the form of a picture left by Dave, Jack's user name, or someone else who decides to step up (I'm not quite sure who is doing this now so be patient).

Also Matt will drop by and leave you a picture if he likes the cut of your jib. The more outlandish the picture the more he likes you. 

After that, if we truly believe you are one of us, this introduction will turn into a heated debate over something mundane that will be sprinkled with dick jokes. When this happens we will start ignoring you in your own welcome thread.

The only other rule I can think of is that as a member of this site you are required to publicly shit on "Fifty Shades of Grey" at least once a week (either metaphorically or literally.  I mean it, last week I literally shit on that book.  Why? Because my copy of Twilight was out of pages.)

Now think of something to do and see that task through to completion,

Chris

doctorrude's picture
doctorrude from Hampshire, England. is reading The Castle-Kafka July 1, 2012 - 5:12pm

Hello

Thanks for all the warm messages, especially the beer one. As much as I enjoy the thought of defecating on Mrs James' book I think I'd rather use it as a way of cleaning my rear end. Can't waste paper now can we?

In answer to your questions Kirk:

1. I munch on some tasty sour cream and chive pringles as I enjoy the delights of the Book of Disquiet by Pessoa.
2. That would have to be William Somerset Maugham
3. Tough one. The only one I can think of off the top of my head is Naive. Super by Loe.

ReneeAPickup's picture
Class Facilitator
ReneeAPickup from Southern California is reading Wanderers by Chuck Wendig July 1, 2012 - 5:28pm

As long as shit ends up on the book in some way or another, it's good.

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters July 1, 2012 - 6:09pm

God but Chris makes us sound weird.  The problem is, that is entirely accurate. 

Welcome.  If any of that sounded terrible, well, I apologize for the sex jokes that will be arriving...probably sometime tomorrow.

 

Michael J. Riser's picture
Michael J. Riser from El Cerrito, CA (originally), now Fort Worth, TX is reading The San Veneficio Canon - Michael Cisco, The Croning - Laird Barron, By the Time We Leave Here, We'll Be Friends - J. David Osborne July 1, 2012 - 6:28pm

Not feeling up to the task tonight? Come on now, that's not the Avery we all know and love.

Do one about genitals.

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters July 1, 2012 - 6:34pm

Hm.  Now I feel put on the spot. 

Actually I'm fairly certain I've never made a sex joke.  Must have been someone else you're thinking of. 

Michael J. Riser's picture
Michael J. Riser from El Cerrito, CA (originally), now Fort Worth, TX is reading The San Veneficio Canon - Michael Cisco, The Croning - Laird Barron, By the Time We Leave Here, We'll Be Friends - J. David Osborne July 1, 2012 - 6:37pm

We may love you slightly less now. Fair warning.

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters July 1, 2012 - 6:39pm

Story of my life.

Michael J. Riser's picture
Michael J. Riser from El Cerrito, CA (originally), now Fort Worth, TX is reading The San Veneficio Canon - Michael Cisco, The Croning - Laird Barron, By the Time We Leave Here, We'll Be Friends - J. David Osborne July 1, 2012 - 6:55pm

Aww. Now I feel bad.

Beer?

.'s picture
. July 1, 2012 - 10:11pm

Welcome Nick! 

We don't bite. Unless you want us to...

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner July 2, 2012 - 3:34am

I thought cutting someones jib was a dick joke. It's not. Here's your picture. You're approved. 

 

Kirk's picture
Admin
Kirk from Pingree Grove, IL is reading The Book Of The New Sun July 2, 2012 - 8:33am

No Matt, you were thinking about the mast not the jib.

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner July 2, 2012 - 8:39am

I gotta go tie up my dingy! 

 

BA- ZING! 

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters July 2, 2012 - 8:45am

Besides, it's the "cut of their jib", not "cutting their jib".

underpurplemoon's picture
underpurplemoon from PDX July 2, 2012 - 4:50pm

Nick! That's so cool that you get to sit by a pond, total inspiration there! Whereabouts are you in England? Welcome!

doctorrude's picture
doctorrude from Hampshire, England. is reading The Castle-Kafka July 4, 2012 - 12:20pm

Ponds, lakes, a lot of puddles as well. I live in the southeast in a little village near Portsmouth.

Hector Acosta's picture
Hector Acosta from Dallas is reading Fletch July 4, 2012 - 12:42pm

As another newbie to this whole thing, welcome!

Also, my introduction thread has most posts than yours. I'm not saying that people clearly like me better, but I'm also not not saying that people clearly like me better. 

doctorrude's picture
doctorrude from Hampshire, England. is reading The Castle-Kafka July 4, 2012 - 1:39pm

Just as academic achievement is no substitute for real intelligence, popularity is no replacement for a good personality.

Thank you for the welcome.

Liam Meilleur's picture
Liam Meilleur from New Orleans is reading The Fall of Kings by Ellen Kushner & Delia Sherman July 5, 2012 - 12:41am

(Does this mean I'm not a noob anymore?)