helpfulsnowman's picture
Community Manager
helpfulsnowman from Colorado is reading But What If We're Wrong? by Chuck Klosterman August 31, 2016 - 5:14pm

Okay, this one is just for fun.

I'm writing a little review book of Choose Your Own Adventure books, inspired by a column I did here. So far, I haven't made it even a decent distance into ANY of these books. I'm trying a few different methods of decision-making, and I decided that I'd like to crowdsource one.

How would you all feel about voting on each decision along the way to see if we can't get through one of these bad boys? I'll provide the needed background for each choice, and then we'll take a poll? 

Who's in?

Thuggish's picture
Thuggish from Vegas is reading Day of the Jackal August 31, 2016 - 8:00pm

eh, i'm down.

smithreynolds's picture
smithreynolds from Spokane, WA USA is reading The writing on the wall. September 1, 2016 - 6:57am

Go for it. I'll play.

helpfulsnowman's picture
Community Manager
helpfulsnowman from Colorado is reading But What If We're Wrong? by Chuck Klosterman September 1, 2016 - 11:07am
Mystery of the Maya

Here's the situation:

You/I/We are searching for our friend Tom. Tom was a news reporter onto some kind of hot scoop related to Mayan temples in Mexico. Tom disappeared at one of the temples, and on the site used for sacrifices, there was FRESH HUMAN BLOOD!

We're met at the airport by Manuel, who was Tom's guide, and who Tom also suspected of being a reincarnated Shaman. Manuel gives us two options.

A) Visit Dr. Lopez, a leading expert on Mayan sacrifice

B) Go check out the spot where Tom was last seen alive

Give us a vote, and also why you picked what you picked. 

Notes: 

-This book started with us waking from a nightmare about being a human sacrifice. A total, "Thank goodness it was only a dream!" moment.

-I feel like it should be noted that a LARGE portion of these books start with you flying somewhere and meeting someone at the airport for the first time.  

smithreynolds's picture
smithreynolds from Spokane, WA USA is reading The writing on the wall. September 1, 2016 - 2:26pm

I would go check to see where Tom was last seen alive, simply because:

1. It has proximity to the mysterious goings on, and there might be something still happening.

2. The spot he was last seen is outside, offers a lot more dramatic choices than the office of the academic. (Even though a lot of weird shit can happen behind closed doors.)

3. Seems a visit to the brainy guy needs to happen once some first hand weirdness is experienced by our protagonist. That's my vote.

Thuggish's picture
Thuggish from Vegas is reading Day of the Jackal September 1, 2016 - 3:01pm

B

helpfulsnowman's picture
Community Manager
helpfulsnowman from Colorado is reading But What If We're Wrong? by Chuck Klosterman September 1, 2016 - 5:06pm
B it is!

We headed to the temple where Tom was last seen, but first had to spend the night in the hotel.

Manuel tries to convince us that, instead of going to Chichen Itza, where Tom was least seen alive, perhaps we might want to go to Uxmal first, a smaller temple that's far older and "filled with mystery." He also cryptically says, "That last day, Tom kept it a secret where he went."

So, as is custom with these books, we are told he was last seen one spot, but then we're told that maybe he wasn't(?) These books are so damn confusing.

We can now choose to

A) Go to Chicen Itza (the original destination) first

or

B) Go to Uxmal instead

smithreynolds's picture
smithreynolds from Spokane, WA USA is reading The writing on the wall. September 1, 2016 - 6:13pm

A. Go where someone tells you not to go.

Thuggish's picture
Thuggish from Vegas is reading Day of the Jackal September 2, 2016 - 12:27am

A, why would you go to some stupid place Tom wasn't?

(We're told maybe he wasn't because they need to compel the other choiec too... and we'll likely end up going there anywaey)

helpfulsnowman's picture
Community Manager
helpfulsnowman from Colorado is reading But What If We're Wrong? by Chuck Klosterman September 2, 2016 - 3:22pm

Holy hell.

We go to Chichen Itza. There's a pyramid, and at the base there are about 20 people. At the top...a UFO! Yep, there's an alien spacecraft floating above the pyramid. Manuel says the people are going to leave Earth for the planet Merganatic. And if we think Tom is among them, we should go too. If not, we should stay.

A: Join the mission, knowing we may never return home

B: Stay

I mean, I feel like this one's easy, right? What are we going to do on Earth? What am I going to tell myself the next time I'm pumping gas and thinking, "Y'know, maybe I should've gone on that spaceship..."?

smithreynolds's picture
smithreynolds from Spokane, WA USA is reading The writing on the wall. September 2, 2016 - 3:25pm

A. I can see why you never made any progress in reading these books, if reading is the right word.

Thuggish's picture
Thuggish from Vegas is reading Day of the Jackal September 2, 2016 - 4:54pm

A

Because protags are crazy.

helpfulsnowman's picture
Community Manager
helpfulsnowman from Colorado is reading But What If We're Wrong? by Chuck Klosterman September 6, 2016 - 10:16am

You are not going to believe this shit...

Gaining confidence, you step into the transporter beam and are carried up into the spacecraft. You hear nothing as you shoot up and away into the far reaches of the universe, to the planet Merganatic and the great Congress on Intergalactic Life. You wonder why the Mayan sites were chosen as contact points. Their brutal and complex society seems an odd choice for other planets. Who knows what lies ahead?

THE END

Soooo you make a bunch of choices, and then when the exciting stuff happens, it's like, "And this is just the beginning of your story!" Shouldn't the story start right about here? Why did we have to choose about going to different locations and boring stuff like that when the cool stuff doesn't even happen until the end?

Thuggish's picture
Thuggish from Vegas is reading Day of the Jackal September 6, 2016 - 10:43am

Way back when I was a kid pringles and Nintendo did a thing where you got one of these for a Mario adventure. It was more fun than this.

How the shit was that an ending though? Fahrenheit 451 had more of a conclusion...

smithreynolds's picture
smithreynolds from Spokane, WA USA is reading The writing on the wall. September 6, 2016 - 4:18pm

AARRGGGH! Helpfulsnowman. That was way worse than a box of crackerjacks with no prize. At least we get the crackerjacks. Lame..... Was this an attempt at entertainment. I am not amused, she said with a snarl.

helpfulsnowman's picture
Community Manager
helpfulsnowman from Colorado is reading But What If We're Wrong? by Chuck Klosterman September 9, 2016 - 3:55pm

Right? What a load. I've heard of starting as close as possible to the end, but who ends at the start?

Thuggish's picture
Thuggish from Vegas is reading Day of the Jackal September 9, 2016 - 6:04pm

Outliners...