Dave
from a city near you is reading constantlyFebruary 21, 2012 - 3:20am
@Dwayne, that was more for Desdemona...I have a bad habit of not using the "@" symbol to identify who I'm talking to. Bad form on my part.
@Desdemona, come on in, don't be shy.
Dwayne
from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updatedFebruary 21, 2012 - 3:25am
@Dave - Everybody's got a story.
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 6:56am
Have some honor, Diaz.
Panda - have I ever been harsh to you? Seriously? I don't remember it if I have. I promise to be extra kind to you for awhile. Fear not.
@Diaz - I feel like you are bitter about losing to me. Right? Is that it? It's okay.
@Avery: These are all shit tests.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 6:58am
Agreed.
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 6:59am
I particularly like the one to Panda. It is so subtly authoritarian. "I could hurt you. But don't worry. I won't." Nicely done.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:00am
Ha- well, in fairness they're meant to be fun, and to test responses.
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:01am
Indeed. That's when they're the best, really. When they're not defensive and they're just there to be there.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:02am
@Utah- thats an alpha trait. Just playful, amused....
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:03am
I'll bet she doesn't even think of herself as an alpha. She figures self-composure is just being ladylike. I surmise.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:05am
No, not her, the alpha triat for a male to have when confronted with said shit test. I think Averydoll is far more sensitive than she lets on. I should stop talking in the 3rd person. Haha
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:07am
Utah believes Matt is probably correct.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:11am
haha, Matt is assumed by Utahs remark.
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:12am
What I'm amused by is the fact that Avery has been stalking this thread (as she does all the others; and she's been spot-posting everywhere for the last 15 minutes), but not responding. I wonder if her face is red...
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:13am
MMM...I miss-read "assumed". *ponders meaning*
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:14am
Meh. It's all good. BTW Jess, Utah just negged you (the male version of a shit test)
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:16am
Lol.
avery of the dead
from Kentucky is reading Cipher SistersFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:17am
I hadn't read this one yet...
I start from the bottom of the posts and work up...I have a process.
Those were not tests. They were just...posts.
"self-composure is just being ladylike."
It is.
avery of the dead
from Kentucky is reading Cipher SistersFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:17am
"Utah just negged you "
When? See, I missed it.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:18am
Dude I am soooooo f----in tired, what do you cowpokes in Tejas do when you're tired besides killin shit. Also, I did rodeo in high school (bull riding) there I said it, and wore boots my entire childhood until I joined the Navy....yes...cowboy boots.
avery of the dead
from Kentucky is reading Cipher SistersFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:18am
Also, what does "negged" mean?
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:19am
When? See, I missed it."
Its like calling you out....like saying (hate using routines)
"Oh are those nails real?"
"No."
"Oh, well, they look nice anyway"
Its kind of calling someone out or, a backhanded compliment. Its the male version. I do it all the time and normally don't even catch myself doing it.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:21am
Neg= negative compliment.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:20am
Anyone else feel weird about hijacking a noobs thread? LOL
avery of the dead
from Kentucky is reading Cipher SistersFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:22am
Oh. So it's being rude.
Interesting.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:23am
Haha, that was a shit test! YOU JUST SHIT TESTED ME! LOL, love it, sock it to me!
avery of the dead
from Kentucky is reading Cipher SistersFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:24am
No, it wasn't!
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:25am
Lies. It totally was, Utah back me up here.
avery of the dead
from Kentucky is reading Cipher SistersFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:30am
See. This is exactly why I said I didn't like that. Because I wasn't testing anything. I wasn't doing anything. I was being sincere and making a statement. I was saying what I was thinking. It wasn't a test for you to see what you would do.
That is what i don't get, why would I do that?
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:35am
Its instinct so you're not totally aware of it. Like "Hey catch dude" And, in fairness, I very, very rarely if ever neg knowingly. For you it's more playful (and in a general way flirty), but from a biological point of view you're seeing who is the weakest. I am not sure why it's bothering you so much.....though I can see how it is offputting and kind of weird but rest-assured, we don't sit around thinking about this stuff, or judging your actions, or god-forbid thinking "I wonder what Jessica is up to" so, just keep right on doing what you're doing. It's fun.
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:40am
Oh. So it's being rude.
Shit test. A very off-handed one. To see if his repartee stands up. And there's absolutely nothing wrong with it. There was some slightly deeper stuff I was just about to preach here, and I completely lost my train of thought. It will come back to me.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:43am
Utah- you give me hope about the game man. So damn sick of dating, and was kind of getting down about it, but you sir are living proof that you lose the game by winning. You found a great girl and won her. AFC Adam did the same thing. I reckon I'll stick with it!
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:44am
Oh! Yeah, here it is. One goal of social interaction is to guide the group's perception and get them thinking the way you tell them. If you do this, you have social, or frame, control. So here you have Matt tell you what negging is. Then you say, "Really, because that sounds like the definition of rude in my book." And this is an exertion of will to change perception. If you can do it, you naturally assume a higher (at least momentarily) status than Matt has. But Matt called you out on your attempt to change the color of the conversation, so it lost its punch.
It's playful sophistry on a relatively sophisticated level.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:47am
Ha! Frame control, I am kind of already naturally dominant so I dont have an issue with it. Perception is reality though. Evenetually in the real world (if you were single and I was trying to pick you up) I would shift things and try to build some rapport. Get to know you, see if we click while pushing for Kino to judge attraction. Thats called calibration.
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:49am
@Matt: The thing that I really love(d) about the game is that it allows you to pursue your goals, whatever they might be. You are not bound into a bad relationship because you think you can't find another one. You're not bound to your corner of the bar because you're not certain about your inability to interact. You're not consigned to your cubicle at work because you're afraid to take risks. And if you keep just enough introspection, you'll see when what you're looking at is where you want to come to rest. But until you see that, you don't have to settle for some option that doesn't fit you.
It's nice to have options.
avery of the dead
from Kentucky is reading Cipher SistersFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:50am
" I am kind of already naturally dominant"
Really? You think that?
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:51am
@Utah- yeah it really changed my world around. I suppose in a way its my way of being the best Matt....as in someday I will be married, and I will want her to have the best of me not a half-assed Matt. Thats at least one of the reasons I got into it. Others are ya know, writing, career, life ect ect
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:51am
You wanna wrestle him and find out?
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:53am
I am kind of already naturally dominant"
Really? You think that?
HAHAH! You just did it again! First, stop lurking, second, I am so tired, third, you tell me.
avery of the dead
from Kentucky is reading Cipher SistersFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:52am
Not particularly.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:53am
Not particularly."
Hey Utah, what part of Texas did you say you were in?
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:54am
Fort Worth. North central. Ish.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:55am
Nice- btw, Jessica, that was a false takeaway.
avery of the dead
from Kentucky is reading Cipher SistersFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:58am
" a false takeaway. "
Whatever you say.
Although I think you might be confused. I was responding to Utah.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 7:59am
Ah, well then it stands as is.
@Utah I always wanted to visit, is it nice?
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 8:02am
Lol.
I was talking to my wife last night about the first half of this conversation we all had a few hours ago. She thought the part about me "winning the game" was awesome. She likes knowing that I didn't ask her to marry me because I thought I had to, but because I felt she was the other half of me and was in a position to know the difference.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 8:04am
Dude, thats awesome. Lovin it.
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 8:04am
It can be. Right now it is. Last June - September was un-nice. Summer tends to be a bit rough here. But fall/winter/spring are typically eight relatively balmy months. Frost here and there.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 8:05am
Well from what I understand, Texas is the place for jobs, and nice people, I have always wanted to try out west if I can tear my heart away from the valley, maybe I'll come and visit. You guys are always welcome with me.
Moderator
Utah
from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtryFebruary 21, 2012 - 8:08am
Word. I will say this: there is still frontier in the American West. You have to look for it, but you can find it. Texas has it, and so do all the Rocky Mountain states. I'm sure Kansas has frontier, but it just looks like the rest of Kansas: flat.
Matt Attack
from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William FaulknerFebruary 21, 2012 - 8:22am
I gotta go- just something calling me out that way....just cant leave with Dad having cancer and such (hence the move to Richmond)....but maybe someday, I suppose I can just settle for now. I know the BLM and other agencies are still giving away land in some of those places....
@Dwayne, that was more for Desdemona...I have a bad habit of not using the "@" symbol to identify who I'm talking to. Bad form on my part.
@Desdemona, come on in, don't be shy.
@Dave - Everybody's got a story.
@Avery: These are all shit tests.
Agreed.
I particularly like the one to Panda. It is so subtly authoritarian. "I could hurt you. But don't worry. I won't." Nicely done.
Ha- well, in fairness they're meant to be fun, and to test responses.
Indeed. That's when they're the best, really. When they're not defensive and they're just there to be there.
@Utah- thats an alpha trait. Just playful, amused....
I'll bet she doesn't even think of herself as an alpha. She figures self-composure is just being ladylike. I surmise.
No, not her, the alpha triat for a male to have when confronted with said shit test. I think Averydoll is far more sensitive than she lets on. I should stop talking in the 3rd person. Haha
Utah believes Matt is probably correct.
haha, Matt is assumed by Utahs remark.
What I'm amused by is the fact that Avery has been stalking this thread (as she does all the others; and she's been spot-posting everywhere for the last 15 minutes), but not responding. I wonder if her face is red...
MMM...I miss-read "assumed". *ponders meaning*
Meh. It's all good. BTW Jess, Utah just negged you (the male version of a shit test)
Lol.
I hadn't read this one yet...
I start from the bottom of the posts and work up...I have a process.
Those were not tests. They were just...posts.
"self-composure is just being ladylike."
It is.
"Utah just negged you "
When? See, I missed it.
Dude I am soooooo f----in tired, what do you cowpokes in Tejas do when you're tired besides killin shit. Also, I did rodeo in high school (bull riding) there I said it, and wore boots my entire childhood until I joined the Navy....yes...cowboy boots.
Also, what does "negged" mean?
Its like calling you out....like saying (hate using routines)
"Oh are those nails real?"
"No."
"Oh, well, they look nice anyway"
Its kind of calling someone out or, a backhanded compliment. Its the male version. I do it all the time and normally don't even catch myself doing it.
Neg= negative compliment.
Anyone else feel weird about hijacking a noobs thread? LOL
Oh. So it's being rude.
Interesting.
Haha, that was a shit test! YOU JUST SHIT TESTED ME! LOL, love it, sock it to me!
No, it wasn't!
Lies. It totally was, Utah back me up here.
See. This is exactly why I said I didn't like that. Because I wasn't testing anything. I wasn't doing anything. I was being sincere and making a statement. I was saying what I was thinking. It wasn't a test for you to see what you would do.
That is what i don't get, why would I do that?
Its instinct so you're not totally aware of it. Like "Hey catch dude" And, in fairness, I very, very rarely if ever neg knowingly. For you it's more playful (and in a general way flirty), but from a biological point of view you're seeing who is the weakest. I am not sure why it's bothering you so much.....though I can see how it is offputting and kind of weird but rest-assured, we don't sit around thinking about this stuff, or judging your actions, or god-forbid thinking "I wonder what Jessica is up to" so, just keep right on doing what you're doing. It's fun.
Shit test. A very off-handed one. To see if his repartee stands up. And there's absolutely nothing wrong with it. There was some slightly deeper stuff I was just about to preach here, and I completely lost my train of thought. It will come back to me.
Utah- you give me hope about the game man. So damn sick of dating, and was kind of getting down about it, but you sir are living proof that you lose the game by winning. You found a great girl and won her. AFC Adam did the same thing. I reckon I'll stick with it!
Oh! Yeah, here it is. One goal of social interaction is to guide the group's perception and get them thinking the way you tell them. If you do this, you have social, or frame, control. So here you have Matt tell you what negging is. Then you say, "Really, because that sounds like the definition of rude in my book." And this is an exertion of will to change perception. If you can do it, you naturally assume a higher (at least momentarily) status than Matt has. But Matt called you out on your attempt to change the color of the conversation, so it lost its punch.
It's playful sophistry on a relatively sophisticated level.
Ha! Frame control, I am kind of already naturally dominant so I dont have an issue with it. Perception is reality though. Evenetually in the real world (if you were single and I was trying to pick you up) I would shift things and try to build some rapport. Get to know you, see if we click while pushing for Kino to judge attraction. Thats called calibration.
@Matt: The thing that I really love(d) about the game is that it allows you to pursue your goals, whatever they might be. You are not bound into a bad relationship because you think you can't find another one. You're not bound to your corner of the bar because you're not certain about your inability to interact. You're not consigned to your cubicle at work because you're afraid to take risks. And if you keep just enough introspection, you'll see when what you're looking at is where you want to come to rest. But until you see that, you don't have to settle for some option that doesn't fit you.
It's nice to have options.
" I am kind of already naturally dominant"
Really? You think that?
@Utah- yeah it really changed my world around. I suppose in a way its my way of being the best Matt....as in someday I will be married, and I will want her to have the best of me not a half-assed Matt. Thats at least one of the reasons I got into it. Others are ya know, writing, career, life ect ect
You wanna wrestle him and find out?
Really? You think that?
HAHAH! You just did it again! First, stop lurking, second, I am so tired, third, you tell me.
Not particularly.
Hey Utah, what part of Texas did you say you were in?
Fort Worth. North central. Ish.
Nice- btw, Jessica, that was a false takeaway.
" a false takeaway. "
Whatever you say.
Although I think you might be confused. I was responding to Utah.
Ah, well then it stands as is.
@Utah I always wanted to visit, is it nice?
Lol.
I was talking to my wife last night about the first half of this conversation we all had a few hours ago. She thought the part about me "winning the game" was awesome. She likes knowing that I didn't ask her to marry me because I thought I had to, but because I felt she was the other half of me and was in a position to know the difference.
Dude, thats awesome. Lovin it.
It can be. Right now it is. Last June - September was un-nice. Summer tends to be a bit rough here. But fall/winter/spring are typically eight relatively balmy months. Frost here and there.
Well from what I understand, Texas is the place for jobs, and nice people, I have always wanted to try out west if I can tear my heart away from the valley, maybe I'll come and visit. You guys are always welcome with me.
Word. I will say this: there is still frontier in the American West. You have to look for it, but you can find it. Texas has it, and so do all the Rocky Mountain states. I'm sure Kansas has frontier, but it just looks like the rest of Kansas: flat.
I gotta go- just something calling me out that way....just cant leave with Dad having cancer and such (hence the move to Richmond)....but maybe someday, I suppose I can just settle for now. I know the BLM and other agencies are still giving away land in some of those places....