Pretty much speaks for itself.
Explain yourself.
my ego?
hmm.. that's tough, im cocky and self-assured, and on most days pretty fucking sure im just a temporarily embarrassed millionaire, but i get ego bruises really easy, and it takes me a long time to recover. once i stopped writing for a year because a professor told me i was wasting my time and my voice was "too dreamlike" (i'll post the story and prove her wrong [again] if anyone wants me to) and that wrecked me, even though i knew that cunt had never published shit in her life, and had nothing to show for her precious MFA, and the class pretty much loved it.
I'm really good looking. On a scale of 1 to 2 I'm a strong 1.
oh, and i am a sexy bitch. thanks for reminding me, brandon.
It's what I'm here for, Chuck.
What the fuck does this have to do with me again?
Ego?
Wish I had one, a permanent one. There's those moments where I am in a room full of either drunken buffoons or a class of brain-washed trust fund kids where I feel mentally superior. Instead of being cocky or saying things to dumb found them; I shock them. I've began looking at every factor of life as a social experiment, it's fun.
Here's some examples:
Today,
I went to Wal-Mart for some mundane fruits and printer ink.
On the check out aisle the lady went to pull a bag and the bag was ripped.
"You'd think a super store like Wal-Mart could make a better bag than this." The young girl said.
I picked up a bag and examined it. (Here's the kicker)
"I don't know, it's a mighty fine product for an Indonesian sweat shop worker that makes 3 cents an hour to produce; can you imagine Wal-Mart functioning without these well designed pieces of plastic?"
Her jaw dropped and the people in line gave me a look like I was a monster.
I paid and as I walked away I said: "God bless you."
People see this as rude, but I was simply stating a possible truth.
The lady probably spent the rest of her shift wondering the origin of those bags and it helped her through 8 hours of shoving peoples groceries into bags and repeating the same programmed voiced lines.
The most fun you can have is at parties though.
You can be anyone, you can be the asshole, or the sympathetic shoulder to cry on.
The guy who climbs on your roof and pisses on your neighbors car while screaming "I AM A SHINY GOLDEN GOD!". When you release the idea of having a personal ego, you can have everyone's ego.
Most of all you give everyone that story they talk about at random times, it's almost better than writing one.
Maybe I'm just a product of 3 years of Journalism, Psychology, and Sociology classes.
Either way there's no such thing as an ego when you adapt to the people around you and become the lead character. I started doing this six months ago and it has improved every aspect of my life.
...I rant sometimes.
I shit my pants recently. Does that count?
One time I was really drunk and fell asleep, I dreamt that I got up to take a shit.
When I woke up the shit was in my pants...
I had an ego-death once but then I cut my hair and stopped being a hippie.
...Bob Dylan?
I have a very well developed Id, does that help? I'm training it to fill in for my lazy (if inflated) ego.
I like to think of it as 'big cock swagger'. The cock's purely metaphorical, mind you.
Freud comes to mind...
Ego kills your talent. (;
Talent kills your ego.
Video killed the radio star.
Someone once told me that they could never keep a blog because it was 'narcissistic'. To which I responded (in longer form), on my blog:
In response to charges of narcissism I say that Shakespeare is probably not the greatest writer who ever lived. Neither is your choice of best artist in any field - painting, music, cinema, photography... Undoubtedly there are geniuses all around the world who either refused to self-promote and never got started at all, or whose stunning works were created solely for themselves, and slipped into the bottom of a drawer to later be thrown away. But Shakespeare wanted his plays to be read, to be staged, and to be seen. And we still do what he demanded. All the greatest artists you can think of share one common feature - every single one of them had the audacity to think that you cared about what they had to say.
So those are my feelings on the issue, not that I expect you to look at them or anything. Man, how egotistical do you think I am?!
There has to be a good amount of ego to even let someone read your work. You yourself must deem it 'worthy' of someone else's eyes. I mean how many artists were not appreciated until after they were gone? During their lives they were seen as crazy. Which brings me to my next point... you gotta be somewhat crazy. Don't ya?
Ah, ego! Inflated by alcohol, murdered by my wife. For any one man to think his definition of ego is superior is the best definition of ego.
I'll have a huge ego once I get that Scribbler badge.
I'll have a huge ego once I get that Scribbler badge.
still the first
I'm happy with my 3rd place thank you
My ego is only as big as Annie's metaphorical cock swagger.
I don't have an ego; I'm just an elitist.
I think studying psychology is very important in terms of writing. Cities are wonderful, too. People watching. Testing yourself in social interactions. Relying on your word when spoken, knowing that you are building material for when you have time to sit and reflect. You learn a lot by listening. It's reading with your ears. After you have that quality, I think it is very easy to analyze the world around you with an unimpeded perspective. You sense it.
People watching is my favorite addiction.
I'm lucky enough to work with kids with "behavioral issues" and "mental disorders" that come from low-income families. So, pretty much, it's all research all the time. Kids say and do the wackiest shit while maintaining a firmer grasp on reality than the big people telling them what to do (in a sense).
I spent six months bonding with an autistic girl... We had a love-hate kinda friendship since my job was to prepare her for a life in mainstream society. I didn't succeed, of course, but the experience has done wonders for my imagination.
Someone once told me that they could never keep a blog because it was 'narcissistic'.
That's why I won't let myself wear high heels. But it's fun to try them on and walk around the store in them. And think about them. My feet need them.
Which reminds me: foot watching is also good for your writing.
Could you hoola hoop in heels Jami?
My ego is buried under my id.
And foot licking. And too short shorts.
Vraj! I bet Jami could.
I use reverse psychology on my ego - tell it it's worthless and will never amount to anything.
I think it's working.
Liana, I've only tried in my dreams.
But this is my ego talking. The selfless jami-being would not wear heels or short shorts for any type of seductive shock effect.
Reverse psychology doesn't work on mine. It's too insecure to show me up.
Jami, you try a lot of things in dreams, don't you? Would the ego Jami-being hula hoop in heels and short shorts? I bet Liana could do that. Shit I bet Sam could do that. That is one of my dreams; to see you three hula-hooping.
Sapple-Dapple: I think I tell my ego the same thing. Clever words girl.
In terms of writing I think we all need a healthy ego, but it's important to not let that ego get out of control should any of us become the next Faulkner or King or whoever...what a writer needs more than anything is confidence...and a thick skin for all those rejections!
@Chester so you wouldn't hoop with us? Hey can I borrow your dream for a bit?
@Michael I could not agree more. Too little ego will not get you anywhere (if you cry for every rejection), too much will put the cart before the horse and you can have a big fall.
I have a struggle on the subject of ego, or maybe just an insecurity (depending on how you swing it.) An example, I struggle now as I did when I was writing and submitting stuff regularly, a few years ago, with the idea of a pen name. I always thought my name wasn't phonetically memorable, thus, not marketable. But then thinking of that feels so vain, embarassing. So maybe I stick to the honest name, may be easier to get paid one day (getting paid writing? Wouldn't know) but it worked otherwise for Jack Ketchum, and Robert Jordon. Overthinking, a bain.
But as seen, My ego is always in check between my very particular/opinionated pretensiousness and my crushing low confidence.
I'm pretty sure it's a good thing to have a big ego, as long as you're not unkind to people. If you can love yourself unconditionally, you're less likely to spend your time stroking yourself wondering what you're worth — and that gives you more time to get stuff done.
I struggled with the pen name thing as well, I mean Wilczynski is a nightmare, but you are right, going with a pen name felt a little pretentious to me.
Not to mention that I just used my rap name, and NK Dub didn't sound very professional either.
I can sympathize with a lot of your thoughts on this subject Renfield.
Wilczynski-
my last name is Butczynski, which is why my middle name took over.
I may or may not be using a pen name, just as I may or may not wish for very young members of my family to read the horror I may or may not write, lol.
It's probably the least effective thing if you're trying to accomplish a goal. All an ego does is temporarily submerge you in your own ether to the point where you believe your experiences matter enough that someone else will actually change their own behavior over them. They never do.
Egos (usually) ruin a good party, a good forum, a good industry. You can have an ego, but just don't make it part of the work your hands are doing. In this context, that means don't let it affect when the hands hit the keys. An ego can live off the possibility of things. Bodies have to live off real things.
"Do the thing, and you will have the power." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
me too.