JameseyLefebure's picture
JameseyLefebure from Liverpool, Uk is reading The Gunslinger- Stephen King March 17, 2012 - 4:21am

Hey Guys -

I had a bit of a question and wanted to see what the general feel was. I'm working on a short story for my uni class that has to be submitted by the end of next week - the thing is I'm having some really mixed feelings about the story. SO I was wondering if it's ok for me to post stuff in the threads for feedback? I'm looking to join the workshops but need ot wait until pay day to sign up by which point the deadline will have passed :(

I didn't want to break the rules or ruffle any feathers as it were so thought it would be best to ask if I can put my story in a thread here and ask for feedback or is that frowned upon?

Jamesey

xx

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. March 17, 2012 - 5:23am

hmmmmmmmm, how long is it?  I don't care but I don't know about other people.  You can email it to me and I'll look at it:  dangrn77@hotmail.com

JameseyLefebure's picture
JameseyLefebure from Liverpool, Uk is reading The Gunslinger- Stephen King March 17, 2012 - 5:25am

Cheers Danny -

at the moment it's just 1500 words - i think finished draft will be cloer to 2000. :) I'm in work at the moment, but I'll send you a copy when I get home :) Cheers mister - and If no-one else says anything by the time i get home I might post it on here - it's a bit of a personal story and I wanted to make sure that my personal experiences aren't bleeding into the narrative as well making sure I've maintained the character through the piece.

And loving your wink :)

 

JameseyLefebure's picture
JameseyLefebure from Liverpool, Uk is reading The Gunslinger- Stephen King March 18, 2012 - 3:28am

edit - wanted to work on

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. March 17, 2012 - 12:46pm

with a title like "A newbie Question about where to put it", I was sure this thread was gonna be about fucking. Oh well...

Nikki Guerlain's picture
Nikki Guerlain from Portlandia is reading Necronomicon Book Three March 17, 2012 - 1:10pm

What you talking about? This thread is totally about fucking.

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. March 17, 2012 - 1:45pm

In that case, find the wettest spot you can and stick it there.

 

 

Nikki Guerlain's picture
Nikki Guerlain from Portlandia is reading Necronomicon Book Three March 17, 2012 - 1:31pm

Yeah if it's wet it's a go even if there isn't a hole associated with it. Dont worry a hole can be made if you really need one. But from my many years experience with my clitoropenis and a slip n slide I can tell you with good authority that you dont need a hole if it's wet enough.

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. March 17, 2012 - 1:45pm

Or take the biggest thing beneath your belt buckle and put it in the place she pees.

(now get your foot out of the toilet and try again)

Chris Davis's picture
Chris Davis from Indiana is reading A Feast of Snakes by Harry Crews March 17, 2012 - 8:03pm

Where to put it?

I'm sure there is an ass to mouth joke somewhere in there but I'm in no condition to find it.

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. March 18, 2012 - 1:21am

As it is best said in Clerks II: 

Sometimes, in the heat of the moment, it's forgivable to go ass to mouth

wickedvoodoo's picture
wickedvoodoo from Mansfield, England is reading stuff. March 18, 2012 - 7:26am

Goes without saying you like that movie Howie.

There's a donkey-show scene at the end after all.

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. March 18, 2012 - 8:49am

I wrote mine first!*

*that's probably not true.**

**Just looked it up.  It's true.

.'s picture
. March 18, 2012 - 8:50am

Sex jokes, sex jokes, sex jokes.

The workshop is 9 bucks month. Put it there.

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. March 18, 2012 - 8:53am

Getting fucked to death by a horse is no joke, my friend!  

And you can pay with a credit card, which means you don't need 'payday'.  

.'s picture
. March 18, 2012 - 8:54am

^ After I read your story, I thought later before I fell asleep that night "damn, I wonder what kind of articles came up when he did his research for that one."

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. March 18, 2012 - 9:01am

Basically this, but they didn't have wikipedia back then.  So... it was articles that hinted about it.  It's amazing how many details I made up that ended up being true.  Then there was video research and that was very bad.  

I wrote the story in 2005, and in 2006 they passed a law making bestiality illegal in Washington State.  In further drafts, I never did look it up to see if it was still legal.  So, there's a lie in that story.  No bestiality in Washington, Alien!

.'s picture
. March 18, 2012 - 9:00am

Sundance AND Cannes!!! Man ya gotta love America.

avery of the dead's picture
avery of the dead from Kentucky is reading Cipher Sisters March 18, 2012 - 9:04am

SOmeone asked me if I had read Bryan's story.  I said I hadn't but that I would do so.  Then they said, "Just so you know, it's about horse fucking".

And I decided not to read it. 

Love you, Howie!

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. March 18, 2012 - 9:06am

You have chosen well.

JameseyLefebure's picture
JameseyLefebure from Liverpool, Uk is reading The Gunslinger- Stephen King March 18, 2012 - 9:20am

I've taken the story down - I didn't mean to piss anyone off by posting it.


I don't have a credit card which is why I have to wait until my pay-day.
 

thanks for taking the time to read the thread.

 

 

Nikki Guerlain's picture
Nikki Guerlain from Portlandia is reading Necronomicon Book Three March 18, 2012 - 9:55am

You should've read it. It's light hearted and funny. Some of the best writing I've seen lately. Not because of odd content. It's just written very well. And I'm sure there's a horse dick metaphor in there somewhere for you Avery. I know how much you like metaphors. And a sea shell is no more natural than a horse dick. So dig in.

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. March 18, 2012 - 9:59am

I don't think you pissed anyone off.  It's just nature around here.  You ask for help, we start talking about animal sex.  That doesn't mean we don't still want to help.  It just means that we are very easily distracted.

 

Also, posting it in an open forum is sometimes considered a form of publication, so if it's a story you want to shop around, make sure you don't post it where it's open to the public.

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated March 18, 2012 - 12:44pm

That isn't a 100% true, this isn't really a open forum. And I don't think many folks are checking here for it.

Dr. Guillotine's picture
Dr. Guillotine from Phoenix, AZ is reading Kurt Vonnegut Slaughter House-Five March 18, 2012 - 7:06pm

I hope not.  I'm worried about submissions because of the whole self publish thing.

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. March 18, 2012 - 8:15pm

Using the workshop isn't an open forum.  This forum thread we are using for this discussion is.  Sorry if I wrote that in a confusing manner.  By my understanding, if Google can archive it, it can be considered self-published by some people.

Dr. Guillotine's picture
Dr. Guillotine from Phoenix, AZ is reading Kurt Vonnegut Slaughter House-Five March 18, 2012 - 7:47pm

Well, good then.  I don't want to try to submit something to a publisher only to hear I published it myself.

I believe a publisher would get decapitated if they told me that.

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. March 18, 2012 - 11:18pm

Are you sure?

Grigori Black's picture
Grigori Black from US is reading Radium Girls by Amanda Gowin March 18, 2012 - 11:41pm

I don't think you pissed anyone off.  It's just nature around here.  You ask for help, we start talking about animal sex.  That doesn't mean we don't still want to help.  It just means that we are very easily distracted.

 

Yeah, the tangents are thick in this place. I'm pretty sure there's someone running around the forums with a cape and a giant 'TM' on their chest. So if you start a serious discussion, it's likely that at some point Tangent Man will swoop in and then it's anyone's game at that point.

Usually it's beastiality or boobs with a healthy dose of Mayhem. Speaking of which, when you do manage to get into the workshop, don't be put off by some of the reviews. A few people here are tough, but they mean well. Of course, there's that one guy who's an asshole, but we don't talk about him.

Anyways, not all of us are easily distracted and- SQUIRREL!!

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 19, 2012 - 12:19pm

Anyways, not all of us are easily distracted and- SQUIRREL!!"

 

If you really want to see how far down the rabbit hole this goes, look up a thread named, "Panda Porn, feat. Balls of Steel"

It started out as an abortion debate thread (with a different name)......then...15 pages later (I think)...yeah...enjoy that. I think that was the name...it might have changed again, I can't find it.