Hey guys. Bradley is a member of our community who often gives helpful advice. So I thought I'd create a page here for his latest book. I've already read it and think it's fantastic.
Here are the details:
A tour-de-force. A harrowing comic masterpiece. A timely novel that transcends the times. An instant American classic. This is what critics are not saying about Bradley Sands' latest magnum opus, Please Do Not Shoot Me in the Face: A Novel.
A novel in three parts, Please Do Not Shoot Me in the Face: A Novel is the story of one boy detective, the worst ninja in the world, and the great American fast food wars. It is a novel of loss, destruction, and—incredibly—genuine hope.
Please Do Not Shoot Me in the Face: A Novel contains three classic Bradley Sands novellas: "Frankie Nougat and the Case of the Missing Heart," "Cheesequake Smash-Up," and "Apocalypse Ninja."
Blurbs:
“Bradley Sands has succeeded where all other novelists have failed: he has written the Great American Novel. Martin Amis came close to beating him to the punch a few years ago, but he accidentally wrote his novel on the wrong body of land and has been crying like a little girl ever since. If you have any compassion in your heart, end Martin Amis’s sorrow with the joy of Sands’s brilliant American prose. But be sure to read Please Do Not Shoot Me In the Face before giving it away forever—Amis has never returned a book in his life.”
—Bradley Sands, author of Sorry I Ruined Your Orgy
“This is a book for anyone who has ever hated someone. This is a book for anyone who has ever wanted to break into someone’s house while they were sleeping, wrap a book around your fist, and punch that asshole in the throat until they’re dead. This is that kind of book.”
—Bradley Sands, author of Rico Slade Will Fucking Kill You
“In Please Do Not Shoot Me in the Face, Bradley Sands uses literary sleight of hand to miraculously create a novel out of three novellas. The novella, “Apocalypse Ninja,” achieves the grand feat of being the stupidest thing ever written. With shuriken-sharp writing, Sands fulfills mankind’s greatest unconscious desire without even pooping his pants.”
—Bradley Sands, author of My Heart Said No, But the Camera Crew Said Yes!
The book is available here: http://www.amazon.com/Please-Do-Not-...dp/1621050106/
Yeah - am waiting on my copy of this being delivered. Shall be all over it like a hungry dog when it gets here.
Rico was great - I have high hopes for this.
In the meantime - anyone who is interested in reading a bit more about Bradley and his work (he's a member here - a nice guy too!) could take a look over here, where he gave Solarcide an interview.
I will be picking this up too. That chapter from Warmed and Bound is hilarious.
@Martin: Nice avatar. Oh wait, that is actually you? Uh-oh, the ladies are gonna go nuts. The guys too.
Thanks a lot for posting this, Jay. And also to Martin and Chester.
One correction (the book's Amazon link doesn't work). Here it is: http://www.amazon.com/Please-Do-Not-Shoot-Face/dp/1621050106/
@ Chester - yeah thats me putting on my sexy face. Woos them every time. Or something like that.
Also good news - thought I was gonna have to wait a little while on this book for delivery, stock issues and all that, but then Amazon emailed me to say it being sent from the UK after all and should be here tomorrow. So that's cool.
What with all the awesome books coming out recently I'm getting snowed under with my 'to-read' pile again. Just when I was starting to catch up. I know this one is going towards the top of the queue though.
Just added it to my Amazon Wishlist!!
Thanks, Josef. I hope you like it.
While I'm at it, I just want to mention that the new issue of my literary journal (Bust Down the Door and Eat All the Chickens) was recently released. It contains stories of an absurd and surreal nature. There's stuff by Laird Hunt, D. Harlan Wilson, Cameron Pierce, Amanda Billings, Kirk Jones, Andrew W. Adams, Amber Sparks, and a novella by Kirsten Alene. Click here for more details.
Also, I'm involved in the bizarro fiction movement. If you're interested in finding out more about it, I would suggest going to www.bizarrocentral.com or checking out the wikipedia article about it.
I've got Warmed and Bound coming in the mail. I'll look for your story Bradley. After the holidays I'll order Rico. I've heard nothing but good things about it.
Bradley's story in Warmed and Bound was epic. I'll definitely check out this novel.
Thanks, guys. Since I don't want to misrepresent the book, I would suggest checking out Martin's interview with me where I talk about the book's status as a novel (it's actually a novella collection that pretends to be a novel).
Cool. Will do.
I'll sure read it. I'm starting on one now and think it's great.
Yeah this was good fun. For me, not quite as great as Rico - but each novella seemed a little stronger and by the end the smile was stamped on my face again.
What's the only thing more fun than pirates vs ninjas? Bizarro pirates vs the most inept ninja in the world.
The 'interlude' parts were pretty funny too.
This would be great for a long coach or train journey - a place where a bit of light humour is the perfect medicine. Livened up a couple of dreary night shifts for me.
Thank you, JRAllison and Martin.
Ebook stuff:
Please Do Not Shoot Me in the Face: A Novel is now available for Kindle.
For a limited time, Sorry I Ruined Your Orgy is free for Kindle, Nook, and on Smashwords.
The price for Rico Slade Will Fucking Kill You has been lowered.
Rico Slade Will Fucking Kill You will be free for Kindle for the next 5 days.
What the crap is Arnold Schwarzenegger doing on the cover of Rico Slade’s book? This is Rico Slade’s goddamn book. Rico Slade is not a body builder, an actor, or a governor. Rico Slade is an action hero.
Rico Slade doesn’t care about the political climate. Rico Slade has an advanced degree in badassery. Rico Slade’s favorite food is the honey-roasted peanut. Rico Slade can rip out a throat with his bare hands.
But Rico Slade has a problem. His arch-nemesis, Baron Mayhem, is threatening to drop a bomb on the Earth that will kill every human being except himself while leaving the world’s currency intact. To save the planet, Rico Slade must journey across Hollywood to find Baron Mayhem. Unfortunately, Rico Slade’s crime fighting style involves ripping out the throat of anyone who gets in his way, including grandmothers and Midwestern tourists.
As Rico Slade leaves Hollywood in ruins, the only person who can stop him from destroying the city is his Jewish psychologist, Harold Schwartzman. Until he does, Rico Slade will kill as many people as it takes to thwart Baron Mayhem’s evil scheme. Rico Slade will fucking kill everyone.
RICO SLADE WILL FUCKING KILL YOU.
sweet
Rico Slade!!!!!
My favorite Bizarro book that I've read to date. It rocks.
This book is too many kinds of awesome.
