Americantypo's picture
Americantypo from Philadelphia is reading The Bone Clocks March 27, 2012 - 5:46am

Semi relieved to no longer be in this. You guys need some valium!

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry March 27, 2012 - 6:01am

Not me.  I'm chill.

SHUT UP! 

VOICES!

KILL! KILL!!

WAAAAARRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Richard's picture
Richard from St. Louis is reading various anthologies March 27, 2012 - 6:04am

still chewing on my prompt. haven't written anything, yet. so many different ways to come at it. had an inkling of an idea as i was falling asleep last night. but now i've forgotten it. i've found that whatever emerges is what SHOULD be written. i like to just hold on to an idea for a few days (or longer) if i can.

Liana's picture
Liana from Romania and Texas is reading Naked Lunch March 27, 2012 - 7:14am

I haven't written anything, I'm not sure what I'll write, but I have a line in my head. It's a cool line though. @Moon, are you done, you're telling me?

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz March 27, 2012 - 1:19pm

@Voodem: That is exactly how I start out, by pasting the prompt. That immediate feeling of accomplishment!

Then I sit there and stare at the blinking cursor. Blinking. Blinking. Blinking. Fuckers mocking me. Shut up cursor! You mocker! I can hear its nagging cursor voice. It sounds like a Kraftwerk voice, a Die Roboter voice. It follows me to bed every night. Blinking. 

Asking:

What Now? What Now? What Now? 

Want How? Want How? Want How? 

Want Who? Want Who? Want Who?

What Own? What Own? What Own?

Haw Town? Haw Town? Haw Town?

Haw Wont! Haw Wont! Haw Wont!

Aw Nth Ow! Aw Nth Ow! Aw Nth Ow!

A Nth Wow? A Nth Wow? A Nth Wow?

Thaw Now? Thaw Now? Thaw Now?

Than Wow! Than Wow! Than Wow!

What Won? What Won? What Won?

 

Bill, I think I am going to need some of that diazepam.

 

voodoo_em's picture
voodoo_em from England is reading All the books by Ira Levin March 27, 2012 - 1:47pm

Panic over I have my idea!

I have managed only 200 words, but oh yes, I am pleased with where they are going.

Unless I just jinxed myself saying that :S

@Chester Yes that's how it is, just staring at a blank page feeling hopeless.

wickedvoodoo's picture
wickedvoodoo from Mansfield, England is reading stuff. March 27, 2012 - 2:27pm

First draft almost finished. So close.

War takes it out of you, huh? Not seen the sky much just lately. However. So close.

The pressure!

Haha. All good. Actually I do almost have a draft finished, though its been tough this time round, the story hasn't come out as cleanly as Walking On Water did on the first run. I am not 100% on this one yet. Clipping and trimming and tailoring be needed. Right now I have a suspicion it s actuallty a bit of a mess and wouldn't get a whole load of votes.

I'm still confident there's a story hiding in there somewhere, I just have to try and make the best of her features.

Profunda Saint-Sylvain's picture
Profunda Saint-... from Calgary, AB is reading Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy Series March 27, 2012 - 3:16pm

Got a bunch down last night. Of course it strayed pretty far from the plot outline (this is why I never use outlines) so now I'm stumped again. My really really long drive home usually helps me ponder things a bit though. Here's hoping it turns out as good as it was when I read it in my head.

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. March 27, 2012 - 3:20pm

Good luck, meat Profunda. I am unsure of how to tackle this one. I just don't want to pick the obvious cliche scenarios.

Profunda Saint-Sylvain's picture
Profunda Saint-... from Calgary, AB is reading Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy Series March 27, 2012 - 3:32pm

I wrote mine as a limmerick. You should do that too. ;)

Profunda Saint-Sylvain's picture
Profunda Saint-... from Calgary, AB is reading Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy Series March 27, 2012 - 3:37pm

my names KElly, Blah blah blah, MY names KELly, BLah, blah blah!

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. March 27, 2012 - 3:36pm

I am going more for a Madmen meets Beetlejuice thing.

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. March 27, 2012 - 3:37pm

Ok Kelly meat Profundia Saint.

Profunda Saint-Sylvain's picture
Profunda Saint-... from Calgary, AB is reading Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy Series March 27, 2012 - 3:38pm

Jesus Jumpin' Jimminy. I should probably start closing my internet when I leave my desk. Now you all know my dirty secret. Blah blah blah.

Jason Van Horn's picture
Jason Van Horn from North Carolina is reading A Feast For Crows March 27, 2012 - 3:58pm

My name is Kelly, and I rub my belly, after eating mincemeat pie. I don't know why I eat mincemeat pie but my belly shakes like some jelly.

......okay so THAT'S why I'm not in the second round!

Nikki Guerlain's picture
Nikki Guerlain from Portlandia March 27, 2012 - 4:08pm

Wow what a lovefest. So many awesome prizes being added! I mean a cock pic? Geez!

Hope everyone is doing well!

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz March 27, 2012 - 4:23pm

@Martin: Fuck You! You better write us a better story than last time. No let downs. We expect to have our tits blown off again.

Hi @Nikkles! We miss you! Well, you and Randy and Bobby.

I have not wrote a fuggin' word.

I been bizzy though. I took some of Richard the Magician's advice and started chewing on my prompt. Even went out and bought some extra nice paper at Staples for the printer. I even printed it out in color. Raspberry red. I been chewing on it all afternoon and it keeps gettin' all mushy so I have to reprint it out again and again. I am starting to get really full and still nuthin'!

So I decided to give that a break and I started watching tape on Bekanator. I think I found a couple weak spots in her defensive line I can capitalize on.

 

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. March 27, 2012 - 4:44pm

Ok, kelly, no more discussing our stories even in vague terms. I see what you are doing, trying to get me Utahnized.

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz March 27, 2012 - 4:45pm

Utahnized!

wickedvoodoo's picture
wickedvoodoo from Mansfield, England is reading stuff. March 27, 2012 - 4:52pm

@ Chester, I'll try,

One things for sure, this story is very different from Walking On Water. Very different indeed.

It's a tougher prompt. Had to scratch my head a while before digging into this one. The are ways the prompt wants me to go but in a way I am trying to resist those. Every story I write, I set myself a challenge. For round one my challenge was to write something good in 3rd person which I don't really feel I have done much of before then. I passed my own little test that time.

This time, who knows? It's a new test. I have failed plenty enough times before.

 

Bekanator's picture
Bekanator from Kamloops, British Columbia is reading Ugly Girls by Lindsay Hunter March 27, 2012 - 5:09pm

I'm getting to know the characters in this story a lot faster than I did the characters in my piece from the first round.  I keep telling myself not to worry about the word count, but it's always in the back of my head.  My goal is to have my first draft done tonight so I can start taking the hacksaw to it tomorrow.

Liana's picture
Liana from Romania and Texas is reading Naked Lunch March 27, 2012 - 5:17pm

I can't stop scratching my head!!!

Profunda Saint-Sylvain's picture
Profunda Saint-... from Calgary, AB is reading Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy Series March 27, 2012 - 5:18pm

Time to switch shampoo! ;)

Renfield's picture
Renfield from Hell is reading 20th Century Ghosts March 27, 2012 - 5:43pm

I don't know how you people work so efficiently. Finishing drafts and revising and shit. Mind bottling.

Profunda Saint-Sylvain's picture
Profunda Saint-... from Calgary, AB is reading Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy Series March 27, 2012 - 5:51pm

I could really use some bottled mind if you're handing them out.

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz March 27, 2012 - 6:02pm

@Fist Kitten: He-he.

Mind bottling. I like that. Minds in bottles. That just might be the spark I was looking for.

Liana, I am doing a lot of the same. That reminds of the time the in-laws were visiting and my younger son who was eleven at the time had really long hair. One night during my older son's birthday party, my younger son kept scratching his head really hard with both hands. He'd been doing it more and more. Finally I looked at his scalp.

Thousands of lice. Thousands and thousands. I shaved his head along with mine that night. Everyone else took their chances. The women refused to shave their heads. Understandable. 

The in-laws returned to France. With American lice. Meanwhile we killed them three times. They finally died. Only my older son avoided infestation. He was straightening his hair at the time. Apparently the heat kills them. Otherwise vaseline works. They suffocate in it.

I still think shaving is the most efficient.

wickedvoodoo's picture
wickedvoodoo from Mansfield, England is reading stuff. March 27, 2012 - 6:05pm

@ Renfield. I am doing it all in epic shifts this last couple of days because from tomorrow I have virtually no time for working on it. Have had a lot of coffee. Right now I am on a mini break to refresh my head.

Still closing in on the goal of a finished draft before I am allowed to sleep. I'm not far off. It's kinda getting late but I think I can do it. What time I do scrape togther after tonight can then be spent double checking and editing and cutting out bits that suck.

Renfield's picture
Renfield from Hell is reading 20th Century Ghosts March 27, 2012 - 6:06pm

@Chester

Plus you look like a badass Kojack. Who loves ya baby? That's Kojack right? I don't fuckin know.

Covewriter's picture
Covewriter from Nashville, Tennessee is reading & Sons March 27, 2012 - 6:17pm

This is fun to watch.

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz March 27, 2012 - 6:30pm

@Rennie: Telly Savalas; Now there is a name for ya. Yule Brenner and Telly Savalas. 

@Covey: You a voyeurist?

Liana's picture
Liana from Romania and Texas is reading Naked Lunch March 27, 2012 - 7:58pm

Kojak, the original bald badass!

Chester, I admit now that I had lice as a kid, and it was horrible (I should move this to laughable admissions). The whole school was crawling with them so you could not escape them. My mom would douse our hair with gas (as in, car gas) and.... no, not set it on fire. She'd cover our heads with a scarf and she'd make us stay like that for minutes (seemed like days) while those little suckers were screaming and dying (and putting up a very itchy fight).

I won't say we're soulmates now, but at the very least licemates.

Bekanator's picture
Bekanator from Kamloops, British Columbia is reading Ugly Girls by Lindsay Hunter March 27, 2012 - 8:31pm

Liana: What the hell?  We just had awesome lice shampoo growing up.  I remember my mom used to babysit these girls when my sister and I were young.  Their household was pretty dirty, and they always had lice and thus, transferred it to me and my sister.  We had to put all our stuffed animals in garbage bags, which was pretty upsetting.

Profunda Saint-Sylvain's picture
Profunda Saint-... from Calgary, AB is reading Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy Series March 27, 2012 - 9:52pm

Draft one - DONE. 

Profunda Saint-Sylvain's picture
Profunda Saint-... from Calgary, AB is reading Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy Series March 28, 2012 - 10:52am

WHAT THE FUCK, Seriously, I am going to throw my computer out the window. Generally, when you finish a story, and you hit SAVE. and you open the new SAVED document to make sure it looks good, and then you go to bed. When you look at the SAVED document again, should the last 900 words you typed not STILL BE IN THE FUCKING DOCUMENT?? Seriously I am going to throw my fucking computer out the window. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!!!

Jose F. Diaz's picture
Jose F. Diaz from Boston is reading Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantel March 28, 2012 - 10:58am

Computers don't lie, they show you exactly what you did. You may have thought you did, but your computer is telling you it was all just a dream.

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz March 28, 2012 - 11:00am

Ouch. I hate that. Sorry Fist Kitten.

@Liana & Rebecca: I am actually shocked that everyone in the world who has hair isn't walking around with lice. Those fuckers are hell to get rid of. And there is nothing to be ashamed of. Lice don't give a flying fuck if you are Martha Stewart, they still want to suck your blood. I always think it is funny the stigma that accompanies lice; only the unkempt and squalid get lice.

When all you have to do is go to the movies or get on an airplane and lean your head back on a contaminated headrest.

Profunda Saint-Sylvain's picture
Profunda Saint-... from Calgary, AB is reading Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy Series March 28, 2012 - 11:08am

My computer is a lying sack of shit. I need to go back to writing on looseleaf, this is fucking stupid.

Bekanator's picture
Bekanator from Kamloops, British Columbia is reading Ugly Girls by Lindsay Hunter March 28, 2012 - 11:21am

Profunda: From my experience, whenever I lose a crunk of work, the stuff I write the next day is usually better.  Hopefully the same goes for you, although I'm sure Danny's pretty smug about this right now...

My first draft is done, aside from an integral falling action scene that I really know nothing about at this point.  Nevertheless, it's pretty much a first draft.  Printin' her out!

Profunda Saint-Sylvain's picture
Profunda Saint-... from Calgary, AB is reading Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy Series March 28, 2012 - 11:24am

I wish i had a goddamn printer. I am too enraged to even write a word right now. I really hope I can get it re-done. I liked what I had a lot. BOOFUCKINHOO!

 

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz March 28, 2012 - 11:43am

You still have it Kelly.

@Rebecca: Good job.

I have this one idea that won't shut up eventhough I keep telling it to. So I might just end up going with it if it is still yelling at me on Saturday.

Bekanator's picture
Bekanator from Kamloops, British Columbia is reading Ugly Girls by Lindsay Hunter March 28, 2012 - 12:09pm

@Chester: It's not all good.  I'm kind of having doubts about my piece, but it's too late to go back now.

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz March 28, 2012 - 12:36pm

@Rebecca: I feel like that perpetually. 

Renfield's picture
Renfield from Hell is reading 20th Century Ghosts March 28, 2012 - 12:56pm

You got half the week left, it's not too late.

I've got Christa Faust's class assignment due friday and these assignments are pretty tough for me. So probably grinding that out until Friday night then starting on this story, I feel I have a comfortable grasp on this story idea so it seems like it will work out.

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz March 28, 2012 - 1:26pm

How is that class Rennie? That sounds like a good one...

Yeah, sometimes, for me, less time is better when I actually go to exgurgitate a ruminating idea. I am the kind of writer who will buff and polish a piece into non-existence given enough time. I could work on one sentence for years.

Renfield's picture
Renfield from Hell is reading 20th Century Ghosts March 28, 2012 - 1:45pm

The class is a magnifying glass on all my writing weaknesses so far. Crime writing, female characters, dialogue, characterization, reimagining literary tropes. Probably the toughest intensive I've taken so far.

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz March 28, 2012 - 2:19pm

Tough is good. So it sounds like you'd recommend it.

Renfield's picture
Renfield from Hell is reading 20th Century Ghosts March 28, 2012 - 2:24pm

Yes, enthusiastically.

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. March 28, 2012 - 3:48pm

At least the stories aren't due til Sunday, if it was Friday I would quit now.

Covewriter's picture
Covewriter from Nashville, Tennessee is reading & Sons March 28, 2012 - 9:42pm

@Chester, I'm not a peeping tom, but its fun to look in and see the universal writing frustrations, makes me feel like I'm not alone. However, I keep reading these chats and not writing anything. Bad. Those classes sound just what I need. Maybe I can save some cash and take one.

@Prof, I also would throw my computer out the window for not doing what I told it to do. It would land right on top of my printer.

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry March 29, 2012 - 5:55am

 

He's here to rip you a new asshole.