I'm a gnome.
If I'm troll, I'm Troll 2. Ohhh My....GOOODDDD.
Seriously, these are all really good. I want to read the stories behind all of them!
Here's the first line of a flash fiction I'm working on for the Flash Me thread. Kinda works in this thread too.
"The murder took thirty seconds. Oops."
Breathing under water doesn't get easier...
@Meat: that is fucking brilliant!
It was and always will be.
Thanks Utah!
Why do you want to know?
Start from the beginning, you died?
A hot poker is just rude.
Humm, harder just like grandpa did.
(I'm going to interpret that ^ as reference to grampa's shine)
A hot hooker is just prude
It's Graduation. But who decides innocence?
Lipstick lesbians are urban fantasy, dude.
In Twain in the meme brane.
Anybody notice we're all dead inside?
We're dead? We're dead? We're dead?
No glovey, no lovey, Chester Pane.
Baby shoes. For sale. Blood red.
Baby shoes. For sale. Blood red."
Not bad sir. But it has to be one sentence me-thinks otherwise mine would be:
Government collapsed. Rabbits everywhere. Run. Now.
Fine how about this:
Six words is not a story.
In Twain in the meme brane. Kudos, sir. For a job... done. (I was going to say well done, but that goes over the 6 word limit. I'm big on rules.)
Kudos, sir. For a job... done.
(I was going to say well done, but that goes over the 6 word limit. I'm big on rules.)
Oh, it has to be one sentence?
George Lucas should'a let it go.
(ok, not a story. But a statement that says enough.)
Mine:
"Dog vagina tastes like human vagina"
Ooooooh, Jonny! You are priceless, my friend. Fucking priceless.
Why don't we just declare you the winner, never ask how you know and then go pray.
Or just have much higher standards.
This is true.
Cheer up! Still got one leg.
(insert other body parts, same idea)
God came inside. Then, life appeared.
(If the second one isn't clear, that's cause I'm not as funny as I'd like)
But there were some great ones in this thread!! Danny, put them all in the intro to the book...
"God came inside. Then, life appeared."
Haha - I see what you did there. Clever woman.
When you sleep, nobody is homeless.
Laurance - that's actually kind of beautiful.
I'm an asshole, but write pretty.
I like Laurance because he's beautiful.
God had OCD in Utahs design.
Utah counts all the pretty colors.
Speak for yourselves, I'm a lady.
I'm a lady because I always hold my necklace against my chest when I spit, so I don't get any on it.
Renee is my new spit-hero.
And now my life is complete! I have inspired someone.
Their screams sounded like God's disapproval.
second attempt:
The next mime I see dies.
I pistol whipped an oompa loompa.
An old military quote:
"Retreat? Hell! We just got here."
-Lloyd W. Williams
The severed penis wiggled, sputtered, shrank.
Rock show tonight, ticket in hand.
I'm very partial to Otis's sentence. It speaks to me. Panda's also speaks to me, but only because I was watching Willy Wonka with my daughter earlier.
Joseph needs to take a shower.
Danny gives handjobs for five dollars.
Hey, I charge ten now!!
Laurance likes man meat in him.
I'm a gnome.
If I'm troll, I'm Troll 2. Ohhh My....GOOODDDD.
Seriously, these are all really good. I want to read the stories behind all of them!
Here's the first line of a flash fiction I'm working on for the Flash Me thread. Kinda works in this thread too.
"The murder took thirty seconds. Oops."
Breathing under water doesn't get easier...
@Meat: that is fucking brilliant!
It was and always will be.
Thanks Utah!
Why do you want to know?
Start from the beginning, you died?
A hot poker is just rude.
Humm, harder just like grandpa did.
(I'm going to interpret that ^ as reference to grampa's shine)
A hot hooker is just prude
It's Graduation. But who decides innocence?
Lipstick lesbians are urban fantasy, dude.
In Twain in the meme brane.
Anybody notice we're all dead inside?
We're dead? We're dead? We're dead?
No glovey, no lovey, Chester Pane.
Baby shoes. For sale. Blood red.
Not bad sir. But it has to be one sentence me-thinks otherwise mine would be:
Government collapsed. Rabbits everywhere. Run. Now.
Fine how about this:
Six words is not a story.
Oh, it has to be one sentence?
George Lucas should'a let it go.
(ok, not a story. But a statement that says enough.)
Mine:
"Dog vagina tastes like human vagina"
Ooooooh, Jonny! You are priceless, my friend. Fucking priceless.
Why don't we just declare you the winner, never ask how you know and then go pray.
Or just have much higher standards.
This is true.
Cheer up! Still got one leg.
(insert other body parts, same idea)
God came inside. Then, life appeared.
(If the second one isn't clear, that's cause I'm not as funny as I'd like)
But there were some great ones in this thread!! Danny, put them all in the intro to the book...
"God came inside. Then, life appeared."
Haha - I see what you did there. Clever woman.
When you sleep, nobody is homeless.
Laurance - that's actually kind of beautiful.
I'm an asshole, but write pretty.
I like Laurance because he's beautiful.
God had OCD in Utahs design.
Utah counts all the pretty colors.
I'm a lady because I always hold my necklace against my chest when I spit, so I don't get any on it.
Renee is my new spit-hero.
And now my life is complete! I have inspired someone.
Their screams sounded like God's disapproval.
second attempt:
The next mime I see dies.
I pistol whipped an oompa loompa.
An old military quote:
"Retreat? Hell! We just got here."
-Lloyd W. Williams
The severed penis wiggled, sputtered, shrank.
Rock show tonight, ticket in hand.
I'm very partial to Otis's sentence. It speaks to me. Panda's also speaks to me, but only because I was watching Willy Wonka with my daughter earlier.
Joseph needs to take a shower.
Danny gives handjobs for five dollars.
Hey, I charge ten now!!
Laurance likes man meat in him.