Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 19, 2012 - 10:25am

Not so much? LOL 

Grigori Black's picture
Grigori Black from US is reading Hannibal Rising March 19, 2012 - 10:50am

@Matt Attack

So when 'Caprica 6' is helping your 'friend' with  'Leveling the Barbarian', does she scream Starbuck's name or 'Stay on target'?

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 19, 2012 - 10:58am

Ha! I'll have to ask her! For some reason she's been bringing up stuff like that a lot lately so I am sure she'll let me know....all I know is, it's ruined the show for me.....nothin but the rain

Grigori Black's picture
Grigori Black from US is reading Hannibal Rising March 19, 2012 - 12:20pm

@Matt Attack

This means that's she's sizing you up, nugget. Get your frakkin' ass in gear.

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 19, 2012 - 12:24pm

sizing you up, nugget. Get your frakkin' ass in gear."

 

Haha, It could be a shit test, but....yeah, no....not gonna happen as far as I'm concerned. It is entertaining though. 

Side note: I also enjoy the BSG terminology passed off in normal conversation. Nice touch. You are a delight sir. 

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 20, 2012 - 2:44pm

Alright, got a new one. 

 

I have been filling out applications for apartments for when I move. I just had to check my birth certificate, because apparently I have been spelling my middle name wrong.....for years and years..... 

User Unavailable's picture
User Unavailable March 20, 2012 - 2:51pm

I have a wiener dog that was raised by 5 cats, he's loveable like a dog, but mimics cats.

Best of both worlds. I believe in the dogs not liking people thing too. My dog is nice to everyone, but he once just randomly bit a douche bag in the face and I personally haven't ever met a dog that didn't like me.

Take Danny for instance.

averydoll's picture
Defender of the People
averydoll from Kentucky is reading Lisey's Story by Stephen King March 20, 2012 - 2:54pm

When I started working for the college I had to get my son's birth certificate for his benefits.  I never bothered to get an official one when he was born, so I had to order it.  When it came, under his gender they had hi listed as female.  It was a big deal.  I had to get a notarized letter stating that my son was a boy.  I kept a copy of the wrong one to show him when he gets older. 

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 20, 2012 - 3:04pm

Take Danny for instance."

 

@AD, you take feminism to all new level. Haha

averydoll's picture
Defender of the People
averydoll from Kentucky is reading Lisey's Story by Stephen King March 20, 2012 - 3:03pm

"@AD, you take feminism to all new heights. LOL"

...I don't know what you mean.

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 20, 2012 - 3:04pm

Yeah, I changed it...then got bored with the joke. 

averydoll's picture
Defender of the People
averydoll from Kentucky is reading Lisey's Story by Stephen King March 20, 2012 - 3:05pm

I still don't get it.

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 20, 2012 - 3:06pm

Yeah, I don't feel like explaining it. 

User Unavailable's picture
User Unavailable March 20, 2012 - 3:07pm

Haha, Matt.

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 20, 2012 - 3:08pm

Kitts, did you ever apply in Chicago?

User Unavailable's picture
User Unavailable March 20, 2012 - 3:10pm

Not yet, I'm honestly not certain I'll be going. I want to that's for sure.

I should see if ComCast has anything around here.

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 20, 2012 - 3:15pm

I'll email what we got, and good to know you got the joke. Hahaha

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. March 20, 2012 - 7:38pm

I don't get what Laurance's joke had to do with Avery but it seems everything does. I think avery is like the Pamela Anderson of litreactor, you know except she's smart and not a whore.

User Unavailable's picture
User Unavailable March 20, 2012 - 9:03pm

We gots jokes.

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 21, 2012 - 10:44am

Ok, I got a new one. Literally  happened minutes ago. 

 

So, I IMed someone. We had to talk about something last night, but she got company. I tell her about some things really personal that we've been talking about it (family, my transfer ect). She doesn't respond, I call her a pet name (sweet ass)....start teasing her about something even more personal (not going into too many details)

She then IMs me back. 

"Matt, I am teaching a class, you're on the projector. lol"

"Well....this is awkward. Hi class." 

"Yes it is. I'll text you later. Haha"

Sigh.....to live and die at Comcast. I am going to crawl into a hole now. 

Grigori Black's picture
Grigori Black from US is reading Hannibal Rising March 21, 2012 - 10:51am

Gotta love technology. Enabling people to create awkward situations from anywhere in the world to anyone.

 

On birth certificates:  My family changed my name and didn't bother to tell anyone. The school system didn't care, so for the majority of my life, I went under an assumed name. Most of the time, it's not an issue. But for certain things like getting married or getting a passport, etc., I have to prove I am who I say I am since my birth certificate and my ID don't match. To make things better, since the mess with 9/11 I can't get a copy of my own birth certificate (because the names don't match). I have to ask my mom to do it. 

So despite the fact that I have almost twenty years of documentation, taxes, work history, background checks, fingerprints, dental records, etc. I need a note from my mother to prove I am who I say I am.

Well played, al-Qaida. Well played.

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 21, 2012 - 10:46am

Dude, OMFG my face is red and I never blush. 

averydoll's picture
Defender of the People
averydoll from Kentucky is reading Lisey's Story by Stephen King March 21, 2012 - 10:56am

@Danny - I'm not sure how I feel about that.  I'm going with uncomfortable. 

Liana's picture
Liana from Romania and Texas is reading Death by Sunshine by Allison Burnett March 21, 2012 - 11:40am

My first day of teaching at this college (very first day, very first class), I was wearing a dress with buttons in the front. Few minutes into the class, an embarrassed girl tells me, "miss, your dress is unbuttoned." My not so small boobs (of course, in their bra) were on full display. Do you think I cared? Not really. Two days before, I had just moved to Texas and within those 2 days I had to buy car, rent an apartment, unpack a million boxes, had two hysterical cats I had brought on the plane who were peeing in the apartment, and I had 4 hours of sleep previous to that class. So I just turned around and buttoned the damn dress and shrugged the whole thing off.

Also: I got my license at 35! (so yes, I'm older than that).

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 21, 2012 - 11:44am

Liana's picture
Liana from Romania and Texas is reading Death by Sunshine by Allison Burnett March 21, 2012 - 2:46pm

Right on!

By the way, I'd name it Starbuck. And the other one Baltar. (I'm going to the store right now to get two)

Arkadia's picture
Arkadia from Australia is reading The Wasp Factory by Iain Banks March 21, 2012 - 9:13pm

Sometimes I get into arguments with people on topics I don't know anything about, and when they prove I'm wrong I keep arguing anyway, just so I can outlast them and 'win'.

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 22, 2012 - 12:56pm

@Arkadia - so you troll?

jacks_username's picture
jacks_username from Louisville, Kentucky is reading Flashover by Gordon Highland March 22, 2012 - 1:37pm

I still take rejections from women and publishers personal.

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 22, 2012 - 1:41pm

I get butt hurt about rejections every once and awhile. Just remember this. A wise man in college told me to remember this (after being rejected by a sorority girl) in between hits from the beer bong. 

Boone Spaulding's picture
Boone Spaulding from Coldwater, Michigan, U.S.A. is reading Solarcide Presents: Nova Parade March 24, 2012 - 12:24pm

Last night I discovered something about myself: I cannot participate in "angry sex" and laugh uproariously at the same time. What happens when I do so? I get an EXTREMELY painful charlie horse in my left buttock.

(I think I'd rather be stabbed in the buttock than to get another one of those charlie horses - it definitely was a game changer and an End To Fun...)

(Why laugh uproariously during "angry sex"? A half-full cup of lukewarm coffee lept off the headboard and landed on my head, baptizing me in Mocha Java...)

Nikki Guerlain's picture
Nikki Guerlain from Portlandia is reading Necronomicon Book Three March 24, 2012 - 12:37pm

Good story Boone better than a cup of coffee first thing in the morning.

Boone Spaulding's picture
Boone Spaulding from Coldwater, Michigan, U.S.A. is reading Solarcide Presents: Nova Parade March 24, 2012 - 12:40pm

What's disturbing: I kinda like coffee in my eyes now. Will I begin my mornings with a jump-start now, by administering coffee via eyedroppers?

Nikki Guerlain's picture
Nikki Guerlain from Portlandia is reading Necronomicon Book Three March 24, 2012 - 12:44pm

Well definitely original. I've heard of coffee enemas but never coffee eye drops. I wonder if that'd work like visine. No occifer my eyes aren't bloodshot just stained yellow from years of coffee abuse.

Grigori Black's picture
Grigori Black from US is reading Hannibal Rising March 26, 2012 - 3:12am

Heh, imagine S&M themed starbucks where the baristas scream at you and throw coffee in your face. The more complex your order, the more you get 'punished' for it. That has potential.

Boone Spaulding's picture
Boone Spaulding from Coldwater, Michigan, U.S.A. is reading Solarcide Presents: Nova Parade March 26, 2012 - 9:54am

^ Like.

Is the rough draft of that story done?

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Lexington, Ky. is reading Strangers in the Land by Stant Litore. March 26, 2012 - 10:13am

@Boone - What you are doing posting about writing on here, you'll throw us all off.

averydoll's picture
Defender of the People
averydoll from Kentucky is reading Lisey's Story by Stephen King March 26, 2012 - 11:07am

Laughable but serious admission of the day:

Just got caught "dancing" in my chair by my supervisor.  I never even heard him coming... 

Boone Spaulding's picture
Boone Spaulding from Coldwater, Michigan, U.S.A. is reading Solarcide Presents: Nova Parade March 26, 2012 - 11:28am

^ Ha! I got caught by an eight-year-old this weekend - I was doing a "happy dance/sassy neck" in my seat as I was drinking a Shamrock Shake. Just like a little kid, doing my ice cream dance....

(how wide were your eyes when you got caught?!?)

averydoll's picture
Defender of the People
averydoll from Kentucky is reading Lisey's Story by Stephen King March 26, 2012 - 11:33am

Better question, how red were my cheeks?  Ha!  Yeah, not my most professional moment. 

But I feel better just knowing I'm not alone.  What can I say, it was a good song. 

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 26, 2012 - 11:45am

Wait, whoa, what was the song? 

 

averydoll's picture
Defender of the People
averydoll from Kentucky is reading Lisey's Story by Stephen King March 26, 2012 - 11:49am

...If you're wondering if I want you to, I want you to. 

Seriously.  If you have three minutes, watch that video some time.  It's cute.  Also, shut up.  I like it. 

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 26, 2012 - 11:53am

<---secretly snickering. 

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 26, 2012 - 2:40pm

Ok, I got a really embarrassing one and it's going to sound totally bat shit crazy, but I sleep with a light on. I  don't mind being outside and in total darkness, but if I am inside a house I have to have a light on somewhere. 

I lived in a really, really old house and there were some things I saw and heard when I was a kid that really freaked me out. So there. 

Boone Spaulding's picture
Boone Spaulding from Coldwater, Michigan, U.S.A. is reading Solarcide Presents: Nova Parade March 26, 2012 - 2:59pm

^ Brave.....

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 26, 2012 - 3:04pm

Haha, I could be in the middle of the mountains, with noting, pitch black and be fine....but sleeping in a house....yeah. Also, SHUT UP Boone! LOL, ya know, I haven't finished reviewing your story, but I think the words, "appalling failure"  might appear at regular intervals. 

Boone Spaulding's picture
Boone Spaulding from Coldwater, Michigan, U.S.A. is reading Solarcide Presents: Nova Parade March 26, 2012 - 3:08pm

HA! Get this: I never learned to drive a stick-shift. I've only parked them, never went through the gears on the road. I don't "know" how to drive a stick-shift. Someday...

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 26, 2012 - 3:11pm

Serious!? If you're going to learn, I would suggest a flat area, popping the clutch on a hill with people behind...not fun. Everything I have owned or driven has been clutch...you get the hang of it, it's easy. 

Boone Spaulding's picture
Boone Spaulding from Coldwater, Michigan, U.S.A. is reading Solarcide Presents: Nova Parade March 26, 2012 - 3:17pm

So I figured, but what do I know? Never did it.

(I've crossed the U.S.A. three times [Indiana to Albuquerque; Indiana to Flagstaff; Indiana to San Diego] and drove an average of 500 miles a week for 10 years. All automatic, no manual...)

Matt Attack's picture
Matt Attack from Richmond, Va. is reading As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner March 26, 2012 - 3:23pm

(I've crossed the U.S.A. three times"

<---Jealous. 

If you can get the hang of easing off in 1st without popping it then you'll be fine. You can normally feel the engine tell you when to shift. It'll grind up, at that point, you just push in the clutch, shift and then done. Or, downshift if you're slowing down. 

Then it is just a matter of feeling the rhythm to it and knowing when to shift and brake. 

It takes a little bit to get the hang of it. I had a tractor almost flip on me when I popped it's clutch, I was hanging on to the steering wheel for dear life, about to jump, so don't learn on those. LOL