R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest December 6, 2011 - 10:31pm

You give handies. Alien gives blowies and the rest of us give money. Seems like a reasonable deal to me. lol

Chester Pane's picture
Chester Pane from Portland, Oregon is reading The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz December 6, 2011 - 10:33pm

I don't think we are going to see Chuck around here for a long time.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest December 6, 2011 - 11:12pm

Why do you think that?

cowboywerewolf's picture
cowboywerewolf from DC is reading Homage to Catalonia December 6, 2011 - 11:39pm

Hunter S. Thompson is a damn good call.

But, if we're going for zombies, anyway: Oscar Wilde. Don't know how helpful it would be to my own writing, but, Christ it would be entertaining.

George Orwell because, in addition to being one of the greatest authors to ever live, he was just so goddamned decent. He made sure that, when he died, his body was hauled out in full fishing gear so everyone would know he was a man of the people (though anyone who has read him, beyond 1984 and Animal Farm, I mean, will tell you that he was a man of god).

Though, top of the list, hands down: Truman Capote.

Plus, with Capote you'd probably get Harper Lee hanging around as well, doing pick-up. 2 for 1 sort of deal.

R.Moon's picture
R.Moon from The City of Champions is reading The Last Thing He Wanted by Joan Didion; Story Structure Architect by Victoria Lynn Schimdt PH.D; Creating Characters by the editors of Writer's Digest December 7, 2011 - 12:00am

Sometimes it's better to learn what not to do, so I'm gonna say Markham, with special guest James Frey.

.'s picture
. December 7, 2011 - 3:45am

Chuck P. probably won't teach until Litreactor is huge.

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry December 7, 2011 - 6:23am

One a little more realistic:  I'd love to see Will Christopher Baer do a workshop.

Fylh's picture
Fylh from from from is reading is from is reading is reading is reading reading is reading December 7, 2011 - 6:52am

I'm sure all this talk of oral sex is definitely going to lure authors into wanting anything to do with the site.

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. December 7, 2011 - 7:32am

Dude, Will Chris Baer is even more of a longshot. He has been off the radar since like 2007.

@Phil---really? Oral sex motivates most men to do anything.

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry December 7, 2011 - 8:03am

All the more reason to make a comeback.  Haven't you ever seen any of the last 4 Rocky movies? 

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. December 7, 2011 - 8:09am

I would love to take a workshop with Baer. I actually wrote a story about him and a dirty email once and he was very sweet about it. He said I had a purty mouth lol.

Typewriter Demigod's picture
Typewriter Demigod from London is reading "White Noise" by DeLilo, "Moby-Dick" by Hermann Mellivile and "Uylsses" by Joyce December 7, 2011 - 8:58am

@Aylee D: that;s scary!

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry December 7, 2011 - 11:22am

Alien, have you ever considered that might be why he dropped off the face of the earth?  I'm not sayin nuthin.  Just sayin. This silence could be all your fault.

ReneeAPickup's picture
Class Facilitator
ReneeAPickup from Southern California is reading Wanderers by Chuck Wendig December 7, 2011 - 12:09pm

Orwell would be really cool. I read some letters he had written to his publishers at the British Library and they cracked me up, I wish I could remember who's ass he was threatening to kick over their shitty writing, but he definitely had more spunk than I would have guessed from reading his work alone.

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. December 7, 2011 - 12:16pm

Thanks utah, blame me. I'm just pissed Godspeed never came out. I'm tempted to stalk him and walk around in his house naked. Kidding!!!

aliensoul77's picture
aliensoul77 from a cold distant star is reading the writing on the wall. December 7, 2011 - 12:18pm

@typewriter, where do you think the idea for savage self came from? It's my Baer fantasy lol i mean i would never do those things but I thought what if...

Nick Wilczynski's picture
Nick Wilczynski from Greensboro, NC is reading A Dance with Dragons by George R.R. Martin December 7, 2011 - 12:28pm

Orwell would be awesome.

Thompson, I dunno, depends on when in his life you caught him. Gonzo (and other biographies) are too filled with horror stories about Thompson on the lecture tour, always late and unprepared and yet forgiven by the people who "just wanted to party with Raoul Duke." I wouldn't get into an online workshop to party with one of his fictional characters, and I have too many doubts about how unreliable he'd be.

Palahniuk would be a great workshop, I'd shell out the money for that. But that's about as far as I'd go. I mean, it would be cool and stuff, but I imagine that it would be about setting the bar way too high with your first novel so that you could never live up to the expectations it imposes.  ;- ) 

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated December 7, 2011 - 12:32pm

I'd like to read some/one of the authors making a small living/extra income from selling ebooks.

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry December 7, 2011 - 12:54pm

Dear Will Christopher Baer:

Please accept my apologies for apparently re-awakening aliensoul's obsession with you and your work.  If you should come home from a long night at the bar some time and find aliensoul wandering around your house with no clothes on, please don't blame me.  I had something totally different in mind when I brought up your name.  It might be best if you offer aliensoul a sandwich, let him read Godspeed (since none of the rest of us are ever going to get the chance)  and call him a cab.  Unless you are overcome by his animal magnetism.  In that case, do whatever seems normal.

Regards,

Utah

P.S.  Was curious if you'd be willing to run a workshop for Litreactor...

ReneeAPickup's picture
Class Facilitator
ReneeAPickup from Southern California is reading Wanderers by Chuck Wendig December 7, 2011 - 1:48pm

^^Hahahahahahahahaha!!

 

"do whatever seems normal."

 

Renfield's picture
Renfield from Hell is reading 20th Century Ghosts December 7, 2011 - 9:20pm

Christ, be careful what you wish for. I told the guys I wanted Stephen Graham Jones to teach a class, and now it's a reality! Right at the least fucking likely moment I would be able to shell out the sheckles for that sort of thing. Thanks for making, and subsequently crushing my dreams LitReactor.

 

(My other suggestions btw for who I'd like to teach at this site specifically: Joe R. Lansdale, Stewart O'Nan, and i think Tom Piccirilli)

Vonnegut Check's picture
Vonnegut Check from Baltimore October 16, 2012 - 8:35am

This is an old thread. But what about:

Sam Lipsyte.

Roxane Gay.

These are two amazing writers. And, far as I know, they both work as professors, so I imagine they know a bit about instructing.

How about it, Mark? Can you get them? 

 

 

 

Dino Parenti's picture
Dino Parenti from Los Angeles is reading Everything He Gets His Hands On October 16, 2012 - 8:42am

Utah beat me to it: Cormac McCarthy. Of course, he would NEVER do it, but it would be such a coup to get him.

As for dead writers: Hemmingway and Bukowski--if only to see how long it takes before they punch and/or sleep with a student:)

Jack Campbell Jr.'s picture
Jack Campbell Jr. from Lawrence, KS is reading American Rust by Phillipp Meyer October 16, 2012 - 10:17am

Joyce Carol Oates. She's extremely productive, extremely good, has written in a variety of genres, and is actually teaches at Princeton.

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. October 16, 2012 - 11:06am

Amy Hempel.  Did I menion Amy Hempel?  Because, Amy Hempel.  

 

Amy Hempel.

GaryP's picture
GaryP from Denver is reading a bit of this and that October 16, 2012 - 1:29pm

Has anyone mentioned Amy Hempel?

Dwayne's picture
Dwayne from Cincinnati, Ohio (suburbs) is reading books that rotate to often to keep this updated October 17, 2012 - 4:49am

Matthew Woodring Stover

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. October 17, 2012 - 6:02am

I think Hulk would make for a good teacher.  HULK TEACH SMASH.

Alex Kane's picture
Alex Kane from west-central Illinois is reading Dark Orbit October 17, 2012 - 9:11am

Neil Gaiman, Joe Hill, Catherynne M. Valente, Jay Lake, Chuck, Ellis . . .

Bradley Sands's picture
Bradley Sands from Boston is reading Greil Marcus's The History of Rock 'N' Roll in Ten Songs October 17, 2012 - 7:26pm

Gordon Lish

Covewriter's picture
Covewriter from Nashville, Tennessee is reading & Sons October 17, 2012 - 9:00pm

I would so chose Joyce Carol Oates . Thanks Alien. I just finished Mud Girl. But also Michael Chabin, or Pat Conroy. 

Utah's picture
Moderator
Utah from Fort Worth, TX is reading Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry October 18, 2012 - 9:03am

@Bradley:  why Gordon Lish?

bryanhowie's picture
bryanhowie from FW, ID is reading East of Eden. Steinbeck is FUCKING AMAZING. October 18, 2012 - 9:26am

God, if Neal Gaiman did a class here, it would be filled in five seconds.  Lots of his fans here. 

Bradley Sands's picture
Bradley Sands from Boston is reading Greil Marcus's The History of Rock 'N' Roll in Ten Songs October 18, 2012 - 9:20pm

He's pretty much known as the greatest writing instructor ever, has a similar reputation as far as editing, and I'm fond of the writers who he has worked with as an editor and instructor. I doubt if he would be into teaching an online class through and he would probably charge a ton. I think the last time he taught was a couple of years ago: http://htmlgiant.com/events/do-you-really-want-to-live-forever/

I'm not crazy about his writing though.